In Word Adorning

Parenting - Justice and Mercy

2010-10-20T23:30:00.000-04:00

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked.

For whatever a man sows, that he also will reap. (Gal 6:7)

Between the two extremes of justice and mercy there is a sweet spot of perfection where our children receive reasonable, natural consequences and appropriate rewards for their actions. It's when the right mix of positive and negative reinforcement expertly trains our children to do what's right and avoid what's wrong. (If only it were as easy as rats in a maze!)

Justice - The virtue which consists in giving to everyone what is his due;

Mercy - That benevolence, mildness or tenderness of heart which disposes a person to overlook injuries, or to treat an offender better than he deserves; the disposition that tempers justice, and induces an injured person to forgive trespasses and injuries, and to forbear punishment, or inflict less than law or justice will warrant.

But where is that sweet spot? How long is longsuffering? Our example, God the Father, left his children in a garden, with plenty of freedoms and a few boundaries. He gave them careful clear instructions and the rest is history. . . When God the Father returned:

He did not lecture

He did not warn or threaten

He did not negotiate

He did not yell

He did not guilt trip

He simply said, here’s what have you done? So now here's what's going to happen.

Was his punishment extreme for a first offense? Did he have their attention? Did He have their respect?

How does that relate to our parenting? You find an offense, or violation of something that's been clearly stated - Do you:

Lecture - "how many times have I told you . . . "

Warn - "if you don’t stop right now I'm gonna. . ."

Negotiate - "do you want to go to . . . then you'd better stop. . ."

Yell - "WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON UP HERE, ARE YOU CRAZY. . ."

Guilt trip - "after all I've done for you, this is the thanks I get. . . "

My parenting style over the years has included all of the above, depending on my mood. It's not something I'm proud of but the truth is - often its hard to know what to do when children don't do what they are told. My mind has to process a thousand different variables and options before I react and by then I've either over-reacted or under-reacted.

When our children were younger, my husband was the one to act swiftly - more like "THE" Father - so here's what you've done, now this is what's going to happen; while I was somewhere in the background vacillating.

Is this behavior disobedience or forgetfulness? Is this behavior the fruit of a rebellious nature or the nature of the age? Am I expecting too much or are they giving too little? What ever it is. What's the reasonable consequence?

I still have to cycle through these questions in my mind almost every day as I deal with twin boys - a couple of teens - and an "adult/child" still living at home. But in the end I've found that consequences speak louder and clearer than words and emotions. Justice can't without mercy kills so there remains a need for a delicate balance to parent with mildness and tenderness of heart, to temper justice with mercy and yet still be honored and obeyed.

How do YOU find the balance between justice and mercy?

Rambling thoughts on the Changing Seasons

2010-10-06T16:12:00.001-04:00

As the summer fades to fall, and we settle into our new school year; I'm noticing how much I need and love this dependable rhythm of the seasons. Summer is great fun, it's relaxed, a little more unorganized and we sort of go with the flow. Near the end it's too hot for comfort and when my garden starts to wither and fade, I'm bored with it, tired of it and ready go inside anyway!

When the fall arrives and school returns, the order returns with it. School, chores, stacking firewood, homework, holidays, movies on Friday, rest on Saturday, Church on Sunday. . . a predictable orderly and rhythm like the waves washing on the shore. I breath a sigh of relief when the first cool breezes blow and we can finally open the windows by day and curl up with a blanket at night.

When the fanciful days of Summer end, I'm ready. The breezes are cooling and for me its time for picnics, yard sales and outdoor activity to begin. The short days force me to stop everything sooner and settle down in the evening - 4 hours sooner than in the summer. Summer just doesn't seem to be the time for books. By early Fall I have list of books lined up that can only be enjoyed in my fireside comfy chair with a hot cup of tea, coffee, or cocoa.

The pantry is as stocked with as much summer goodness as it's going get. I've canned jams, and pickles, frozen tomatoes, string beans, and peppers, dried herbs and now I'm done. My family waits impatiently all summer for the go ahead to start eating the fruits of our summer harvest, so I finally let them open a jar of spring strawberry jam yesterday.

I used to love spontaneity, and loud music and roller coasters and driving fast, and body surfing at the beach . . .

But now I love peace, and predictability. I love order and quietness! I work hard and I embrace my rest. It probably sounds like I've gotten boring. Maybe I have. I use to think my parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles were boring because on a beautiful day at the park or beach they could sit indefinitely and just "enjoy the breeze." For hours? I just didn't get it - then. But oh, how I wish they were alive now so I could "sit a spell" and "enjoy the breeze" with them.

Hope you are settling into a easy fall rhythm that involves some work, plenty of rest, cozy comforts, good books and fall breezes.

Health and Fitness on my Mind. . . Again

2010-09-03T21:44:00.000-04:00

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit in you, whom you have of God? And you are not your own, for you are bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's. (1Co 6:19-20)

When the message comes from a multitude of counselors it must be time to listen.

After a speech about how priceless our health is and how dangerous high blood pressure can be. The Big Guy, in an attempt to help me, put us both on a plan. . . "but wait" no preparations, no countdown until the start date, no waiting until Monday, or the first of the month. "OK Honey, here's what we're gonna do. . . " Phase I: Fruits and veggies only! In addition I was already trying to eliminate salt. How much can a girl take at once. The flesh cries out; but so far so good. I'm really thankful for the support because I need it.

Despite my effort to "cut back" and eliminate salt to lower my blood pressure naturally, I really could use this cleanse and cold turkey weaning from meat (pun intended).

In a recent doctor visit I was asked to hold out my hand. So I did (palm up). He traced his finger around my palm, cutting off the fingers. I knew where he was going. "I know, that's my serving size of meat, twice a day isnt' it?" He replied, "No, twice a week." Gasp, I only eat fish, chicken and turkey, but still that's too much. I don't know where people get this stuff, but lots of people are saying it. Less meat! Less meat! a

A few days ago, I received this sobering question "Health and Fitness Just How Valuable is it Really?" Read the article here.

Fitting in exercise is so hard during school, but then again it was hard in summer, and gardening isn't cardio enough to count. The doctor says try to exercise 45 minutes per day 5 days per week. I wonder again. . . where do these numbers come from.

I'm trusting in the wisdom of all this counsel and praying for God to help me get fit. Arrrggg!!!

Embrace or Not

2010-09-02T22:18:00.000-04:00

To every thing there is a season, and a time for every purpose under the heaven. . . a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

(Eccl 3:1,5)

When is it time to refrain from embracing? Don't we live to embrace? Is that a woman thing? Eve's costly mistake was embracing what seemed good. It seemed good for wisdom, good for food, and good to look at.

EMBRACE
1. To take, clasp or enclose in the arms; to press to the bosom, in token of affection. 2. To seize eagerly; to lay hold on; to receive or take with willingness that which is offered; as, to embrace the Christian religion; to embrace the opportunity of doing a favor. 3. To comprehend; to include or take in; as, natural philosophy embraces many sciences. 4. To comprise; to enclose; to encompass; to contain; to encircle. 5. To receive; to admit. 6. To find; to take; to accept. 7. To have carnal "relations" with. 8. To put on. . .

EMBRA'CE, v.i. To join in an embrace.

EMBRA'CE, n. Enclosure or clasp with the arms; pressure to the bosom with the arms. 1. Reception of one thing into another. 2. Sexual intercourse; conjugal endearment.

So to embrace a thing we put it on, take it in, accept it. To take it to our bosom, eagerly and encircle it sounds intimate. In fact this word is also used to describe an intimate encounter.

There's so much to learn beneath the layers of words. They are so simple yet so profound. There's a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing. There is no such thing as being "open minded" if it means willing to "embrace" any and every thing.

Some people call that being judgmental or intolerant. I thought the same thing of my elders , they were always pointing out faults in people, and new ideas. This brings back memories of my grandparents, aunts, uncles and parents talking about the character of the people that had been in, or on the fringes of their lives. Or my parents and grandparents disagreeing about new ways of doing things. As I grew older these discussions turned on my friends and my new bright ideas and I was quick to get defensive. But many years later I find myself doing the same thing. Hating on new music, new TV, new clothes, new technology, and even being "judgmental" about people.

You know its teenagers and young adults who can't believe I'm so "narrow-minded" but I say when it comes to my life, children and my house, YES I am the gatekeeper. I will be very intolerant, narrow-minded and judgmental before I embrace anyone or anything.

Welcome Back School

2010-09-01T21:06:00.001-04:00

School is upon us again!

#1 in college.

#2 leaving home to finish at a high school for the arts. sniff sniff

#3,4 &5 still at home - schooling!

It's going to be a challenging year. The girls will carpool some days and sometimes I'll drive, and do school in the library with the boys. We get a lot of uninterrupted work done there without the distractions of home but it makes for a very long day.  We all need to be as organized as possible to pull this off: Breakfast planned and easy, lunches planned and packed, dinners planned and ready and everything else packed and stacked by the door.

Several years ago, when I was new to homeschooling I began to search for a way to STAY CAUGHT UP! Between school age children to homeschool, and babies underfoot, I found myself drowning. Managers of Their Home (MOTH) helped me put my homeschooling day in order around life, kids, chores etc. . . and FLYLADY helped me develop daily habits and routines that keep order without having to devote hours at a time all in one day to housecleaning and chores.   When I begin practicing these NEW (to me) ways of keeping my home. I discovered they were sounding a lot like my Grandma's way of doing things. So she was right.

It's really quite simple. Good habits keep order! Daily pick-ups, laying things out for tomorrow, good planning ahead along with a reasonable weekly schedule designated days for chores and errands and nothing ever gets so out of control that becomes overwhelming. Of course things get dirty, piled up, sporadic and unpredictable - THAT’S LIFE - but for the most part when I get overwhelmed, I slide back into my familiar routines, take one thing at a time and things get are soon in sync.

A friend told me that if you learn to do something right (like handle and shoot a gun properly) even if you don't do it again for years, when you pick it up again (even under stress) you are more likely to do it right by default than to follow wrong old habits: If and only if you don't let those wrong old habits develop.

This is true on many levels. After many years of practicing the daily routines and having designated days for chores and errands the transition to school has not been hard despite the new constraints on my time.   I'm thankful to have a familiar rhythm that I've practiced enough to know it in my sleep. (And I am literally following the routines in my sleep).

How's school going for you?

Casting stones and Building walls

2010-08-23T20:58:00.000-04:00

To everything there is a season. . . a time to throw away stones,

and a time to gather stones together. . .
(Ecc 3:5)

Digging a garden from virgin ground you encounter stones. So before you plant you toss them aside. Good soil is rich, soft and moist. Everything a stone is not.

To build a wall you gather stones. Stones stacked one upon the other tightly fitted together form an impenetrable defense. Building upon a stone foundation is wise and safe.

There's a time to toss out rocky distractions and hindrances that prevent us from being fruitful and there's a time to gather and collect solid stones of wisdom, and truth to build our lives on. There's a time to let go of old ways, old ideas and old habits and to embrace bigger and better.

I'm tossing . . . weakness, complacency, distractions, frustration, negative thinking, negative talk, and negative feedback and anything that prevents the word from taking root in my heart and producing fruit.

I'm gathering . . . fervent powerful prayers with committed prayer warriorsfor my house and my family, words and thoughts that are true and lovely and of a good report, and truths and promises to build my hopes on.

Once upon a time, I was in a place that I wanted to stay. It was safe, comfortable and peaceful. I thought is was all I needed. My husband dared to dream bigger to reach higher. It felt frivolous, and I had no vision for it. We visited a church the first Sunday of the year and this is what I heard . . . (paraphrased)

God has promises and desires to bless us, for us to increase and grow naturally and spiritually. But we hold on the the past, to old ways, to old stuff. How can you open your arms and receive something new if they are full of baggage (stones). Let it go, put it down, cast them out and build your life on the solid rock promises of God no matter where they lead. . . etc, etc, etc. . .

Wow, what a revelation no wonder it is written "without a vision the people perish" Unless I was willing to see the virgin field of possibilities, cast away the stones and build a new future this and many other blessings would have passed me by.

GOT STONES?

Sabbath Please....

2010-08-14T19:35:00.000-04:00

There remains a rest to the people of God. Hebrews 4:9

Another week has come and gone. The days whizz by in a blur. . . I have so much to do and so little time. I remind myself to breath and to remember the seasons. That's right! "Do what I can and to let go of everything else." Breath. . .

Today I could be,
maybe even should be doing a lot more than resting
like. . .
Canning-cucumbers and peppers are still waiting in the refrigerator.
Sorting and organizing seasonal clothes-they too are waiting in "keep/toss/wash" piles.
More coupon shopping-two more days of super double deals.

But I'm tired. I want to be still. My mind and body are thankful for rest. The house is clean, food is prepared and today I'm entitled to this rest. Ahhhhh. . . I'll see that to-do list later!

Do you slow down at least one day per week to rest and refresh yourself? You should!

Rest

2010-08-06T22:29:00.000-04:00

Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden,

and I will give you rest. (Mat 11:28)

Garden Inspiration

2010-08-05T02:32:00.000-04:00

A photo collage from a suburban raised bed garden! See more. . .

How's your garden growing?
What are you harvesting?
Weeding?
Fighting bugs?
Canning?
Dehydrating?
Freezing?
Planting again?

Garden Fresh Gazpacho

2010-08-05T02:19:00.000-04:00

Gazpacho? A great way to use the abundance of fresh garden produce that I hope is pouring out of your gardens this summer, ENJOY!

Complete recipe is here!

Weep While There is Hope

2010-08-04T00:15:00.002-04:00

To everything there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under the heaven . . . A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance; (Ecc 3:1,4)

There is a weeping that is for joy and a weeping for sorrow,this WEEP is: to mourn with tears, to lament, and is contrasted with to LAUGH which is: to rejoice and make merry. So there is a time to lament and be filled with grief, and then there are times to rejoice and be glad; but sometimes there are times when you must DANCE which is to "jump around wildly with joy." (definitions from Strong's Hebrew and Greek Dictionary )

While Kind David's child lay sick he fasted and wept. But when the child died he washed himself, ended his mourning, and ended his fast. He said that while the child lived there was hope, now there was no more reason to weep because it would not bring him back from the grave.

My father used to say often: "I'm not trying to be your best friend." and "I'm not trying to win a popularity contest." In other words. I don't really care if you like me right now and I don't care how you feel about this decision. It was his time to weep. Because while the child lived there was hope - that I would be saved. With all due respect, when those years of weeping were over, we had the best relationship/friendship. He'd accomplished his mission. When I learned the lessons he was trying to teach, we laughed, we rejoiced and we DANCED.

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth. (3Jn 1:4)

We are reading the biography of Ben Carson. In his early years he struggled in school. His mother made the decision to cut off the TV and make both of her boys read two books per week. He attributes this to his later success in school as it increased his vocabulary, and helped him become a better student. She made an unpopular decision that paid off later. It would have been easy as a single mom to allow TV to fill the voids of an absent father and a very few other luxuries. In the end Ben Carson became a brilliant neurosurgeon and highly respects his mother for encouraging him, challenging him and believing in him.

I will have no greater joy than to know that my children walk in truth. To know that they have arrived at the place where they are meant to be in life, safe and fulfilled in the center of God's will.

But for now it is time to weep, to make unpopular decisions, to disturb the peace, to lament; cry out and even fast if necessary while there is hope. It’s time for the refiner’s fire!

My children range in age of from young adult to 10, all wonderful people; but they are all works in progress still in need of refining. I really hate being hard on them, revoking privileges, making them repeat chores again and again, saying no, or seeing them upset, especially with me. But I have to remind myself of the season and remember that the time to weep precedes the time to laugh.

When my children walk in truth, lay hold of their destiny and God’s perfect will (i.e knowing God, marrying the right person and rejecting all others, are walking in integrity, gainfully employed and living a purposeful life, etc) I will rejoice because this will be my greatest joy, then the good time will roll and I will dance - wildly with joy.

A Reason and a Season

2010-07-25T00:35:00.000-04:00

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven . . . A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up. Ecc 3:1,3

A time to kill? A time to break down? I've never understood

the violence of the Old Testament. I understand the reasons in my head. But like a child who is forbid to speak or ask any more questions from an elder; I close the book saying in my heart, "But why?"

Why did so many people die by the thousands?

. . . and David slew the men of seven hundred chariots . . .(2Sa 10:18)

. . . the LORD sent a pestilence . . . and there died . . . seventy thousand men. (2Sa 24:15)

. . . and there fell at that time of the Ephraimites forty and two thousand. (Jdg 12:6)

I know the obvious answers: sin, disobedience, rebellion, idolatry. But still - so many - so violent. That was then.

And this is now . . . it seems the sin, disobedience, rebellion, and idolatry continues, but Grace abounds. Jesus had the power and strength of His Father to punish sin and disobedience but He came softly like a mother to show us and give us time to repent. But how long do we have? He will return! Do you remember ever waiting for "daddy to get home" when you'd done something wrong? What's worse, waiting or the final confrontation?

To everything there is not only a time but a purpose. . . a purpose for pain, for war, for death, for sorrow, for cutting away, for tearing down, for exposing, for crying, and for dying. Could it be so we can learn, so we can grow, so we can get it right before he returns?

Most of the good things in my life have come out of painful struggles. Growing up I was always being taught right from wrong. But the only lessons I learned had to hurt. I have suffered some things to get to where I am and I've felt the sting of chastisement; but I have never seen the wrath of God fall on humanity or lived in the midst of a famine or war were tens of thousands die in a one day. I count that a blessing and I hope that any future lessons I need to learn I'll learn them the easy way by simply hearing and obeying, and not needing to be "taught."

My husband and I remember this universal quote that we can appreciate now like never before. It punctuated every lesson our parents and grandparents were trying to drive home. I don't want to ever hear it again, but I often quote it to my children. If they only knew the implications, they'd grasp the lessons now.

"KEEP ON LIVIN' YOU'LL LEARN"

and did I ever!!!

What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound?

God forbid. . . Rom 6:1-2

Summer of Sacrifice

2010-07-21T02:32:00.001-04:00

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted . . . (Ecc 3:1-2)

The wisdom of Solomon is like a cool breath of fresh air on a hot, hazy, humid summer day. The summer has been anything but a break. I'd begun to think I was sinking under a weight of wet towels, fresh vegetables, overripe fruit (with its incessant cloud of fruit flies)endless meals and school. Since school has shifted from the school room (upstairs away from distractions) to front and center at the kitchen table, I can't seem to leave the kitchen or get off my feet.

This is the season for harvesting vegetables and fruit and figuring out creative ways to eat them every day or store them. I still plan - but our meals depend on what's ripest and must be eaten today so . . . when I've got a couple of eggplants I have to make a Parmesan, and when I've got too many tomatoes and no time to slow cook tomato sauce, then I'm coming up with a dinner that needs lots of salsa. I haven't clipped a coupon all summer but our stockpile of deodorant, toothpaste, soap and bottled water is still supplying us. When this season is over, I'll clear out the expired's and start over stockpiling in fall. At that point meals will become more predictable again.

Overall its been a good summer although its going down as our "summer of sacrifice." We've had to sacrifice a vacation to build a deck and a fence. We've spent our summer in school but the classes are prerequisites so our middle daughter can attend a college preparatory art school (on scholarship) this fall. It's an exciting chapter in her education, and will help launch her into college, prayerfully with more scholarships. And the swim team, proved to be biggest summer sacrifice. It has cost me every day of the week, lots of meals and snacks and practically all night on Wednesdays. But the boys have gone from non-swimmers, dependant on floatation devices, to masters of the pool, diving and swimming all four strokes. I'm very proud of their progress in such a short time.

And this too shall pass. . . Thankfully seasons change and I'll shift my perspective, redirect my efforts and adjust my priorities. The swim team will end, this summer school rush will also end and in fall I'll begin a new school year with only three students. The garden will succumb to frost and we'll begin to eat the stored fruit of our labors. Until then I do what I can with the time that I have, knowing that something has to wait undone until another season.

My Daddy

2010-06-20T22:45:00.000-04:00

My Daddy prepared me to live without him.

Taught me everything he could.

He knew this day would come

He always said, "You'll have to fend for yourself I want you prepared."

I always said - "Don't talk like that."

He always replied, "I didn't come to stay."

He was a perfect father on earth.

He introduced me to my father in heaven.

He always made me laugh.

He taught me to think.

He loved me. . . so so much.

I have one comfort.

We will meet again!

But living without him still hurts so bad.
My beloved words fail today to say what's in my heart.
He is missed - deeply
I'm prepared but I'm still not ready!

What's the Word This Summer?

2010-06-18T00:05:00.001-04:00

See a man diligent in his business? He shall stand before kings. Proverbs 22.

Blogging has taken a back seat to life. {sigh} I'm not fond of saying I'm busy. But I have no time to waste or spare. Every day arrives full of work to do. School, home, children, errands and business demand my time.

I've learned something about myself: By default, I can waste a lot of time with good intentions. I can putter about wanting and needing to get so much done, but often I'm just spinning my wheels.

Now that I know this about myself, and I've seen the consequences (wasted days) I seize the day and take it on with a plan. I have to assign time for work, time for rest, time for people and I have to eliminate distractions or else there is no balance. Balance is important!!!!!

Sometimes it comes down to diligence - the art of working hard and steady without being sidetracked. The definition says it so clearly.

DILIGENT:

1. Steady in application to business; constant in effort or exertion to accomplish what is undertaken; assiduous; attentive; industrious; not idle or negligent; applied to persons.

2. Steadily applied; prosecuted with care and constant effort; careful; assiduous. . .

In an effort to give due diligence to all that is on my plate this summer, I've had to let some things go and say no to others. I can honestly say I do have time to blog, but the question is will I use my time to blog. We'll see. . .

Here's what's up:

The garden is in full swing.

If you have any organic suggestions for pest problems hop over here and share. Thanks!

Our home schooling has rolled over into summer school.

This summer all of my kids are on the swim team.

I am starting a business as an investment in my future.

Finally, I love my job as a volunteer GED tutor.

Life is full, but I’m determined to give diligence to those things that are most important and guard my time against distractions and waste. I don’t want to forsake rest and never want to be so busy that I can’t have time for the people in my life that mean the most.

What are you up to this summer?

Let's Rest!

2010-05-28T21:09:00.000-04:00

And God blessed the seventh day and sanctified it, because in it He had rested from all His work which God created to make. (Gen 2:3)

Don't Skip Breakfast

2010-05-26T23:22:00.000-04:00

She also rises while it is still night, and gives food to her household, and a share to her young women. . . She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.

(Pro 31:15,27)

This meal lovingly prepared by my 17 yo daughter while we did yard work outside.

When I take a shortcut it cost more than it gives.

For instance I think, "we'll just have cereal today."

Then I watch as they file in, pour, then crouch behind the box to crunch alone.

Always alone.

One day, one box. Then its gone.

They awake from their stupor asking, "what's for breakfast?"

Then I think, "I hate cereal for breakfast."

So I stop whatever I was anxious to do with the time I'd saved.

I cook, set the table and fill the house with the smell that says "good morning."

I call, they come, they sit, we pray, we read, we talk, we laugh.

I think, "I should never have forsaken this."

Does cereal make me do that?

Not the cereal, the mindset.

Breakfast doesn't take much.

Just thoughtfulness. Care. Love.

Real dishes, setting the table, serving dishes instead of the pans.

Little things that say this is a communion, not a mindless ritual.

Breakfast is a gift.

It's a sacrificial service that could be abbreviated - but at what cost.

It is the foundation that the day is built on.

It makes me choose whether I will give due diligence to my work, my service.

Or take shortcuts to free up time.

To do . . . what?

I'm reminding myself to seize the mornings while they are still here.

To plan, prepare and present this gift to each new day.

The rewards of time well spent, are worth ten fold the cost.

Establishing a worthwhile tradition.

A sanctuary in a fast and impersonal world.

My 16 yo son bringing me his own specialty, a spinach herb omelet garnished w/red pepper and parsley.

Raised Bed Gardening

2010-05-23T14:42:00.001-04:00

I never thought I could be excited about gardening. When I was a teenager, it was forced upon me by my father and grandfather. Who hauled me out the garden for tedious chores like weeding, harvesting, shucking and shelling.

Now I can hardly stay out of my garden. I only wish my father were alive to see me.

But my garden is not my father's and grandfather's garden. I spent my first 3 years here in the country gardening the the old fashioned hard way. Tilling, planting in rows, weeding, loosing the battle to weeds, and finally quitting in August. To read more go here

Distractions

2010-05-19T01:46:00.000-04:00

She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her sons rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her. Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all. (Pro 31:27-29)

The woman described in Proverbs 31 is remarkable to me as much for what she did not do as for what she did. In her time there were no conveniences to make life easier or work faster. They had tools, and resources; but not what we call conveniences. She didn't have a microwave, electric or gas range, she also didn't have a TV, computer, telephone, or cell phone. There was no washer, dryer, or dishwasher but there was also no soccer, scouts, or karate. She did not have a Bible, or bible studies, VBS, youth group, women's groups, seminars, workshops, clubs, or choir but somehow managed to excel be called blessed by her family.

So what did this woman have that we don't have or the better question is what didn't she have that we do. Distractions. All of the things that fill our life and supposedly make it better aren't improving the quality of it at all.

Though we have a government to regulate the quality of our food, supermarkets selling quick and easy meals and the modern kitchen appliances that do all the work for us; the quality of the food a modern family eats is inferior. The allergies, and poor health we see rampant proves that for all of our knowledge and technology we aren't getting any healthier. Women of old, even as recently as my grandmother’s generation cooked meals from scratch. Real food: local, organic and all natural.

Though we have at our disposal more Word, more teaching, more teachers, more books about the Bible, more churches, more church related activities and more kid friendly church programs and education than any generation before us neither we nor our children are getting any more moral. In fact morality is declining. This current generation is the most rebellious and disrespectful and each subsequent generation is sinking lower and lower.

Though we modern SAHM' s have the latest and greatest gizmos, gadgets and support groups to help us cook, clean, organize and keep our homes a large number of women still can't cook decent meals or keep a their homes clean. Compared to the women of my grandmother's generation ours is a disgrace. Yes a disgrace!

There is no excuse - we have too many advantages to fail. So what's wrong? The very things given to us to help and enhance our lives are stealing and destroying it. When we don’t have to invest our full time and attention to a task the results suffer.

When cooking became convenient it also became thoughtless, cheap and unnutritional. When training our children ceased to the parent’s daily job and became the shared responsibility of the church and the “village,” the children went wild. When we got telephones, computers, faxes, and cell phones we stopped making time to sit down and talk. The more we have the more we lose.

If we can’t give time and thought to our family meals but can line our freezer and pantry with boxes we are distracted, if we fail to teach our children God’s precepts but always take them to . . . (fill in the blank) we are distracted. If our homes are cluttered but our calendar is full we are distracted. If we are too busy to nurture friendships but spend inordinate amounts of time on the computer we are distracted. Distractions make us give less than 100% to what is important by taking our time and attention. Distractions pull us away from God’s perfect will for us by making us settle for what is fast and easy. Distractions make us put our trust in things that don’t satisfy our needs.

Define your distractions, then defy your distractions. To be continued. . .

Defining Womanhood

2010-05-15T01:43:00.000-04:00

For I know the plans that I have for you purposes which I am purposing for you, says Jehovah; purposes of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jer 29:11

I used to think that because "to everything there is a season "some essential parts of me had to be on hold until another part ended. In some ways I guess that’s OK. But it never resonates as enough. I don't just want to just be like the Proverbs 31 woman - one day. I AM like her, now. I WAS CREATED TO BE LIKE HER. I have all of the potential she possessed - NOW.

Forgive me if that sounds "big headed" but it's not just true of me, it’s true of most of my closest friends. In fact many of the women I know and associate with on a regular basis are awesome women of God. Creative, entrepreneurial, giving, faithful, prepared, crafty, resourceful, well dressed, love their husbands etc. . .

Most of us left high school with some idea of who we wanted to be when we “grew up.” It probably changed over time. But at least in those days you saw yourself as an individual. You may have gone to college, graduated and even worked before becoming a SAHM. Somehow on our journey to womanhood, especially biblical womanhood we peeled away the layers of individuality and became one dimensional mom-wives. Cooking, cleaning, scrapbooking, breastfeeding, and with homeschoolers curriculum, curriculum and curriculum.

In marriage we lay down independence and become one, interdependent on each other. But we don’t give up our individuality. My husband complements me but he doesn’t complete me. Our children – though they are our most precious work – are not ours to keep and they do not define who we are. We define them by our example and our exposure. We love, train and provide for them and then one day they’ll rise up, fly away and call us blessed.

When they fly away – who will be left behind? What will occupy your time and your thoughts? Will you have a purpose – an individual calling on your life for something that is uniquely you?

If your children are young, then this may not be your “season” to leave home, go back to school, or start a business. But today we can dream and prepare for that day. We can broaden our scopes of interest beyond the borders of home and school. Look ahead and dream. See the vision then write it down. Then break the vision down into goals. Then the goals into steps and then divide the steps over the time and then do one thing at a time.

Does this contradict the notion of pursuing simplicity and of reducing busyness? Am I saying in my last few post don’t do church work but find some other purpose besides the most important calling to home and family and fill your time with that? God Forbid. I hope you are reading that there is busyness that is meaningless and busyness that is purposeful. I hope you are reading between the lines of the Proverbs 31 woman to see a woman who excelled at being a wife and mother and so much more. The totality of womanhood is defined in this woman. She is not a lofty goal, she is within our reach.

. . . Write the vision, and make it plain on the tablets, that he who reads it may run. For the vision is still for an appointed time, but it speaks to the end, and it does not lie. Though it lingers, wait for it; because it will surely come. Hab 2:2-3

Finding the Center

2010-05-06T02:12:00.000-04:00

Therefore give to all their dues; to the one due tax, the tax; tribute to whom tribute is due, fear to whom fear is due, and honor to whom honor is due. (Rom 13:7)

When my twins arrived I was in the midst of running a business and homeschooling my 1st three children. If I had a mantra, it would have been "to everything there is a season." Clearly something had to go. So it was the business.

Later it was the endless stream of church activities. My days were filled with babies and school, and my nights I spent with a bleed proof bible highlighter, notebook and concordance. I couldn't wait to put the kids to bed – and settle into to my comfy wing back beside the perfect oak bookshelf topped with a lamp. I realized then how much I loved the WORD.

To study it or to live it?

I didn't like when anything or anyone wanted that time from me, especially my husband. The Big Guy wanted to catch up or simply turn in before 2am sometimes, ya know. But it made me irritable; as if motherhood induced sleep deprivation wasn’t enough. After all, what's more important than Bible study? I noticed the same edgy irrigation when my morning quiet time was interrupted by a waking toddler. I drank coffee in those days so I cherished the sleepless nights. While I was studying something was lacking in my house.

What is more important than Bible study?

Application! The conviction: Sarah, Abigail, and Ester - my sheros - did not have Bibles, nor did they spend their morning’s journaling. They rose early and their candles burned late but not to feed their own insatiable appetite for knowledge. They applied the knowledge they had and were found pleasing.
Diligent study is necessary! We are commanded to study! Don’t think for one minute I'm saying it’s a waste of time. But when and how much is enough? The lesson was simple. Give each thing - each calling - its proper time, its due benevolence, as unto the Lord.

My husband probably doesn’t remember this like I do. Putting the books down and spending the evenings with him was like a balm in our wounded marriage. I had given him a gift in his very own language. Throughout my days of church busyness I self righteously called “commitment and dedication” then through the months of immersion study; I hadn’t realized it was wounded, until it was almost too late. This simple act was the beginning of a season of healing (not without its valleys) that stretched over the next few years and is still culminating in a unity and peace I never imagined . . . that’s a story for another time.

An amazing thing happened when I laid down that thing I most treasured (my time) it was multiplied back to me. I surrendered some nights and, slept like a rock and then other nights I stayed up to read, rested with my house at peach. In addition, I gave up the caffeine because needing it to function and having a headache without it was addiction. I still enjoy coffee but I don’t depend on it. In my search for truth about the busyness that had consumed me my life’s pendulum swung out to another extreme. I have a tendency to swing in extremes. All the way to one side - then backway over to the other - before I rest somewhere in the middle to the place of balance where I find the center of God’s will.

This is an ongoing battle as the demands of life war for my time. . .

Busy Doing What?

2010-05-05T09:00:00.001-04:00

You worship what you do not know, we know what we worship, for salvation is of the Jews. But the hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers shall worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father seeks such to worship Him. God is a spirit, and they who worship Him must worship in spirit and in truth. (Joh 4:22-24)

I had an epiphany!

It was about 8-9 years ago on a Wednesday night: Bible study for adults, youth group for teens, jr. youth for preteens and just behave and be quiet for my twin babies. My husband was at work, so I was being faithful.

As I sat in my seat juggling the Bible and the twins - training them to respect the house of the Lord, someone came and whispered in my ear. "The Senior youth group is going to a concert down the road at [another] church." A concert, why a concert? I puzzled.

I endured the evening. Learned little.

After church, the youth returned. We drove home. My sr. youth remarked about the strobe lights and head banging "Christian" music. My two jr. youth remarked about the cheese doodles they had at snack. My heart sank. I thought of my own evening, with the twins. Learning nothing.

Questions ping-ponged in my mind. Was this a productive evening? Did we learn anything of Jesus, our Messiah? Why did I come out here tonight? Did "real" followers of God do concerts, cheese doodles, and arts and crafts.

From that moment on, every "church" activity that had filled my calendar began to be filtered through my doubts and questions. I asked God, "what are we supposed to be doing?" I read nothing but the word, for one year - it was a fast from all other literature and ideology. I continued to attend church but my activity level decreased as I found myself immersed in the story of the History of the life. I began to see the broad sweeping picture of nations rising and falling, worshiping or not worshiping God, blessings and judgments and each generation moving closer to salvation and deliverance . But I also began to question the dynamics of the families, with women, men and children. I tried in each story and event to imagine the children, the mothers, the fathers and how their life and daily worship was shaped by the moving of God in their nation.

Women and men of old were busy. They were busy with a life that didn't involve the conveniences we have. But the people God holds up for examples for us to follow had lives anchored in their worship; without Bibles, Churches, auxiliaries, groups, radio, TV, tapes, DVD's, books, journals, workshops, revivals etc. They were commanded to worship. Given the appointed times and manner of their worship. And they still walked with God and were found faithful. My life did not measure up.
I was busy too. Too Busy. But very little was worship. It was activity with no Biblical precedent. In my life the children were segregated by age to have their "lessons" dumbed down. In the Bible I found God calling "all the congregation" together to worship. Children must have been there; listening to the reading of the commandments, listening to the proclamations of the prophets - learning to respect a HOLY GOD on his terms. The only time God singled out a group was men, leaders and heads of families so they could go home and teach their family.

On every corner in the city we lived in churches were grasping for market shares each one outdoing the other to "reach" the lost and unchurched. Meanwhile within the church it is the handful of faithful workers who run without ceasing to keep this engine of events in motion.

Fundraisers have replaced old fashion remove-your-gold-giving, community outreach carnivals and gospel sings replaced who-so-ever-will-let-him-come. No need anymore for the Holy Spirit to draw them, or the foolishness of preaching to convict when you can get them in with an inflatable Easter bunny and a moon bounce and keep them with lock-ins.

My endless treadmill of activities, fundraisers, bazaars, VBS, and community "outreaches." felt less and less about worship and more and more about marketing. My kids equated church with friends, fun, and food. We rarely took our shoes off for HOLY GROUND encounters.

My children were supposed to be learning the precepts of God at home. That's what the Word teaches. I had no right to be upset that the "activities" were just entertainment and socialization for them. I could change would have to change and give God the quality time He wanted. But working parents haven't got the time to make family worship at a home a priority. So all that's left is corporate worship and children are left to sunday school teachers and youth leaders for their spiritual training.

And Moses called all Israel and said to them, Hear, O Israel, the statutes and judgments which I speak in your ears this day, so that you may learn them and keep and do them. (Deu 5:1)

. . . And you shall carefully teach them to your sons, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise up. (Deu 6:7)

Here's the irony: My husband and I both attended this church together. However most of the activities beyond worship and prayer, I attended alone with the kids. I was an "active" member, working, teaching, helping serving. My husband opted out of most of it. He dismissed "that stuff" as fluff that wasn't required. He's more of a big picture kind of guy. He'll pray, worship, study, and he loved fellowship with the people but he didn't care for the rest. Another man in our church was the same way. I always thought he was odd. He would participate in service, prayer, studying, but never in sales, dinners, and events like that. I didn't understand. Now I do.

This is not a criticism of my church or yours. This was my epiphany. There are lot of activities in and out of church that dominate the 24 hours we have to accomplish life each day and they are not evil. But they distract us from what is really important. While we are running around doing what seems right, there is a truth that IS right. I'm not saying I have attained, but I strive to find truth, and balance. I want to worship God and give Him what He requires and I also want to get off of the endless treadmill of activity that consumes the time that was better spent on HOLY GROUND.

And He said, Do not come near here. Pull off your sandals from your feet, for the place on which you stand is holy ground. (Exo 3:5)

Living a Full Life

2010-04-28T14:34:00.000-04:00

She also rises while it is still night and . . . her lamp does not go out by night.

(Pro 31:15,18)

Life is full.

"So much to do, so little time." Is that really true?

I hate the word busy, because its only ever used as a reason not to get together and spend quality time with people you love. On the other hand; life is full of things to do and we are all given 24 hours each day to do them.

Sometimes I resolve that there are seasons for things, so I don’t' worry about doing too much at one time. I make up my mind that it's enough to home school, keep my home, tend my garden and take care of my husband. Other times I can't imagine that that's all. I need more. I want more. I must reach out beyond my house and wifely duties and fulfill a different calling - my individual unique purpose.

When I read about the Proverbs 31 woman, I marvel that her life was so full. Her hands extended beyond her house, family, husband. She was an entrepreneur, she was a charitable giver. She was crafty and creative and she worked with her hands. She was the Martha Stewart of her time.
I see her example as being the totality of who we can be. She models all the gifts God has given us. She is the full Pie Chart of Womanhood. Can a woman be content without all of those things. Of Course! Does she have the gifting, the time, the resources and the wherewithal to be all of those things - Absolutely! Does she need to rise while its still night, and stay up burning the midnight oil? I hope not.

The irony is that the more things I have to do, the more I get done. . .

How are you fulfilled beyond the obvious first calling on your life as wife and mother. How do juggle the demands on your time? How do you find balance? How can you keep peace and embrace a Sabbath of rest in the midst of an ever growing to do list?

Share your thoughts in the comments below. I look forward to hearing from you.

Evolution - Its My Life!

2010-04-16T19:43:00.001-04:00

It is my life
All mine!
Events, decisions, steps and missteps
Page by page
My story unfolds
I alone wield the pen and command my own script
Then the plot rebels in twist and spins
My story tells itself without the authors ink
Playing on stage without the playwrights consent
My cast and crew I watch adlib
This is NOT how I wanted to write my story
"Erase this scene"
It won't change
"Retell this scene"
I plays the same
"Cut Cut Cut," I scream
This is my life!
Unwieldy pen, I toss to the wind
Unruly players, fired
What's done is done
I can the script
This story is a mess
Be still my life I am undone
Shhh, listen
"I know the plans I have for you"
The Master playwright speaks
The author of all history has come to direct
He erases the scenes
He repairs the plot
He saves my story
The past He sealed and I will heal
The unwieldy story He'll now rewrite
Fresh chapters unfolding in His grace
I follow His lead
Events, decisions, steps and missteps
Page by page
My new story unfolds
It is my life - this time - in Him

Evolution - WHO AM I?

2010-04-14T23:09:00.002-04:00

EThat's the question I've been asking most of my life. When Jr. high and high school were divided neatly into cliques. My friends and I didn’t' seem to fall into one.

We weren't allowed to wear anything too far left or right. No extreme hair or clothes. We weren't openly rebellious and didn't make trouble. We had two parents and in tact homes. We were stable, run of the mill, middle of the road kind of kids.

But I wanted a clique. A defining style. To belong to something that made everything predictable and clear. I don’t know why.

I searched: trying out slang, cliques, clothes, music and always came back to the middle of the road with my same faithful best friend. We'd met on the first day of 6th grade, I was eleven going on twelve. We became inseparable.

I moved away 3 years later. I tried out new friends and new styles in high school. None were a fit. In the end we, my one best friend from the first day of 6th grade, and I remained the same, run of the mill, middle of the road kind of kids, inseparable.

The search lead me down some foolish and folly filled paths. . .

When I look back I'm ashamed and embarrassed . . . What was I thinking?

I wasn't. I was a child trying to find myself.

In college, there were too many choices. I tried them all. A down to earth girl with home training, good morals, parents who cared and had instilled sound wisdom: trying to be hard, trying to be cool, trying to be fly, trying to be his or his or his. . . desperate to be wild and free. Trying to fit where I was never meant to fit.

My parents told me to go to college and find like minded kids, join a church, join on campus clubs of kids who are "about something, " and of course study. . . I did neither.

I met a lot of people I called friends, I had a lot of what I thought was fun. I tried a lot of mask I thought would fit. In the end the grades and friends and fun hit an all time low. I found out exactly who I was not and then I could finally see exactly who I was.

So with my one best friend, I embraced my run of the mill, middle of the road me and found it wasn't so bad. So, I wasn't given to extremes, with my hair, nails, body art, or outrageous art student style. I wasn’t preppy , or afro centric, or athletic, or artsy, or goth, or ghetto, or punk. I never joined a sorority, or club and never found a defining, style, clique, or club to call my own.

I did discover that I was still unique, and that was good. I was talented, highly favored, balanced and blessed, with one best friend who knew the real me, and loved me solely for me; and wonderful parents who prayerful and patiently watched the chameleon flash from skin to skin. I settled down, brought up my grades, graduated, grew up (a little more), married a guy who was never that lost, started a family. And then began the process again asking . . . Now who am I ?

Evolution: The Woman Grows Up

2010-04-12T06:32:00.001-04:00

Created as the weaker vessel. But imbued with strength. Yes, we fell from grace and bear the stigma of being the reason there's sin in the world. But we also have the distinction of being vessels of life. I am empowered by the strength of the women in my life. I am inspired by their courage and their survival.

There's nothing scientific here. Just my own observations of adult girls who grew up to become mighty women of God. One woman inspired this story, and she is very dear to me. But her story is so like many others. In telling hers, I tell theirs. In fact quite a few women I've had the pleasure of intimate fellowship with have declared: that at one point they were passive and weak little girls and then something changed.

They began their journey, hopeful and trusting in his every word, hanging on his promises. I am talking about their husbands, not their Heavenly Father. They embraced married bliss believing humble obedient submission would yield the peaceable fruit of joy.

One broken promise, after another shattered dream coupled with hard work, and more hard work, added to sacrifices, and selfless devotion, peacekeeping, cooperation and too much compromise. . . And then that woman gets tired.

She gets tired of waiting for him to be the man she once believed he could be. She gets tired of putting her trust in him so she begins to put her trust in HIM. She gets tired of working, tired of waiting, tired of taking without complaint everything on to her shoulders. She is weaker but she has had to be strong and now she is tired.

Tired of being a child of the Most High wandering like a prodigal. Tired of the wilderness when she's been promised a "land flowing with milk and honey." Tired of forsaking the power that's only a prayer away.

So she surrenders to God. . . Lays her life at HIS feet. . . Cries out to him, "naked came I into the world - naked I will leave. Its all in your hands I give up." God is moved with compassion, He bottles up her tears. Through a torrent of emotions she cries . . . and cries . . . and cries. To some she looks drunk with her groanings to others who can't understand: she has lost her mind. But to the contrary she has found it.

Then she rises
Shakes off the fear, doubt and the appearance of weakness.
She knows what she has to do and has the grace of God to do it.
She has a voice and she uses it.
She learns the weapons of her warfare are not carnal. She wields them.

This new woman becomes a force be reckoned with.
This woman makes changes that affect the generations.
She defies the generational curses and patterns set before her.
She becomes the matriarch of a new legacy.
Husband and children arise and call her blessed.
This woman is all of us . . . If we can glean inspiration from women of old, and by faith embrace the strength, power and abilities God has given us.
Any similarity to your story is because it’s a universal story. What I've shared was inspired by one woman and she knows who she is.

ARE YOU THE SAME WOMAN YOU WHERE 5, 10, 15, 20 YEARS AGO?

I'LL BE BACK NEXT WEEK !

2010-04-05T08:14:00.001-04:00

I'll be away from my computer for a few days, so this week there will be no new post. Next week when I return, I'll be exploring a THEME FOR THE WEEK that I'd like you to ponder.

The EVOLUTION of a WOMAN. . .

I've known and talked to a lot of women and there's a common thread in us all. As we grow, learn and experience life (good or bad) we are evolving. Our thinking, tolerance, patience, understanding, devotion, hobbies, interest, priorities and even our self image is changing.

WHO IS THIS NEW WOMAN?

HOW HAS SHE CHANGED?

WHY DID SHE CHANGE?

Be prepared to leave a comment and inspire others with your evolution. . . If you aren't a blogger, then post as anonymous or sign on with blogger and get a profile (not sure how that’s done but it can be done) I really want to hear from you! Thanks.

Blessed Among Women

2010-03-30T00:12:00.000-04:00

The LORD bless thee, and keep thee: The LORD make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee: The LORD lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace. (Num 6:24-26)

My parents gave me a Bible. My oldest son scribbled in it when he was a toddler. I dated and labeled the marks and cherished it. Years later the Bible was in a canvas bag in my van. The bag was stolen. Several more years later. A big hardware store in our town closed. They'd found a bag in the employee break room with some papers with my name and number. I collected the bag and the Bible, and everything else that was in the bag. When I told my late father , whom I love still with an aching heart, he smiled wide and rejoiced with me. " Isn't that something. God smiled on you. I mean He really does smile on you."

He used to tell me I was blessed, and that I had FAVOR. Talk about the power of words to give life. His words live and breath in me even now. When I think otherwise, they breathe new life into my defeated weary bones and revive me. I can still see his wide smile as he shook his head in amazement whenever God did something wonderful.

Words are so powerful!

I can't explain this thing called favor. But I see it. My dad was right, it's been happening all of my life. Has my life been silver spoon easy? Oh Heck no! I've had some hills to climb. Have I been good and worthy, OH heck no! Nevertheless, I am happy, I am at peace and I am healthy. But I don’t deserve anything but punishment.

Is it because of the prayers of my parents and grandparents? Probably. Is it because I repented and got right with God? Probably not, I only surrendered the remnant crumbs of my life to God after I'd screwed it up? No, it's nothing I did because sin has consequences. I should be suffering! But because of the fervent prayers and God's smile I am blessed and highly favored. It's also called Grace and mercy. It's completely undeserved.

Favor doesn't make sense! It is God's right to show kindness and mercy. He delights in it.

Over and over God's love and provision has been demonstrated to me and my family. Never ever has there been an earthly explanation for many of these occurrences. Sequences of events so orchestrated and intertwined that only God could be responsible. Just for me!

Are you awed by His Grace and Love?

Living Words

2010-03-24T02:49:00.000-04:00

You are our epistle written in our hearts, known and read by all men . . . not having been written with ink, but with the Spirit of the living God; not on tablets of stone, but in fleshly tablets of the heart. (2Co 3:2-3)

I love words
I love Good words
I love God’s words

They are like honey on my lips and a balm to my soul
I love the shades of meaning hiding within the roots
The hidden implications and subtleties are glorious
How precious is one perfect word that tens could not express

Spoken words have the power of life and death
Wield them with care, sow them with discretion
Unspoken words remain dormant like seeds.
Doing no harm or good

We scatter them into the wind
We will eat the fruit of them

Wistfully whirling the bitter and the sweet mingle in my mind
God help me to banish the bitter.
To sever their roots to render them powerless
And lay hold of the sweet to adorn me from the inside out
Inwardly beautiful and outward manifesting His Glory
A living epistle written by God

Lord, Render powerless unfruitful words spoken over me and my house. Help me set a guard over my own mouth and let the words of my mouth and the thoughts and intents behind them be pleasing in your sight. Hide your Holy Words in my heart so I will not sin against you. Adorn me with your words; write them on the tablet of my heart and make me a living epistle read by men.

Going Out in the Sun is Like Going Home

2010-03-19T10:13:00.000-04:00

To every thing there is a season, and a time for every purpose under the heavens: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pull up what is planted; (Ecc 3:1-2)

Outside spinach, cabbage and greens planted in the fall of last year are waking up.

Herbs yawn and stretch new growth through the winter bedding.

They are calling out to me saying, “Hey look over here we are ALIVE!”

Inside seeds and cuttings are started and we wait with bated breath to see something sprout.

Spring Inspires Hope!

Nothing does my mind and body good like gardening.

As the sun begins to warm the earth something wonderful is happening in my heart.

Where I was once cold and brittle I am becoming limber with hope and anticipation.

I weed out the old dead stuff and await what is new.

Seeds I planted that I thought were dead are sprouting with new life.

What a wonderful miracle!

There is HOPE!

My garden is a respite from everything life has become.

It nurtures a meek and quiet spirit in me as I plant in it.

It is slow, easy, peaceful and predictable.

God whispers there.

I retreat there when my mind and heart are heavy.

When I cry there every blossom looks on with compassion

When I rejoice I can almost hear it erupt with praise and thanksgiving.

It is a giver of life and hope.

God created man and put him in a Garden

Tending it was his first assignment.

Gardening is like coming home.

Humility

2010-03-18T00:39:00.001-04:00

Humility, n. - freedom from pride and arrogance; humbleness of mind; a modest estimate of one's own worth. In theology, humility consists in lowliness of mind; a deep sense of one's own unworthiness in the sight of God, self-abasement, penitence for sin, and submission to the divine will.

Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than themselves.

Others better? Like who? Co-workers, neighbors, friends, family, parents, children, husbands?

Do not let each man look upon his own things, but each man also on the things of others.

My stuff, my needs, my wants AND other people's stuff, other people's needs and other people's wants.

For let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus . . .

This mind? As in to care about other's more than me, to think of others as much as myself?

. . . who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation,

Equal with God but became of NO reputation. Could I do that? Would I do that?

and took upon Himself the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men.

The form of a servant - shaped like a man? Servant? Man?

And being found in fashion as a man,

God? Servant? Man?
How low would I go? How low would you go? How low did He go?

He humbled Himself and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross.

All the way to DEATH.

Therefore God has highly exalted Him, and has given Him a name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of heavenly ones, and of earthly ones, and of ones under the earth; and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. (Philippians 2:3 -11)

Lord help those of us who wear flesh in the likeness of (wo)men to also be servants like you. Help me to keep my perspective as I am called to humility each day. Remind me of your obedience and its cost and help me to be thankful that the sacrifices I am called to make each day will only cost me the minor discomfort of selfless humility and not death.

The State of our Flocks

2010-03-16T11:53:00.001-04:00

Be thou diligent to know the state of thy flocks, and look well to thy herds. (Pro 27:23)

Tracking is on! I sat down with my kids ages 9, 9, 15, and 17 (20 yo was absent but could use this lesson as well) we talked about the importance of keeping an account of what you have.

Not knowing is neglect.

I showed them my check book register and gave each a copy of the bank statement then we went to work, highlighters and calculators in hand. The twins dismissed themselves when we got deep into it.

We divided the purchases into categories: bills, food, gas, mad money (miscellaneous impulse purchases), education and entertainment. It was very enlightening.

Now we see where the money goes. They understand the need to be careful. They concluded: to cut the mad money – because I don’t need any more books from goodwill!!!

NOTE: Whenever I discuss money with anyone in this house, it’s MY spending that is the first to get slashed.

I thought our food budget was $150/week. So far, for the month of March it's close at $178/week; it wasn’t as bad as I thought. We’ve had some extras - a gallon of honey, big sale on ice cream, deli meat for super subs last weekend, but these were indulgences not weekly purchases. Our Food budget also includes household items, personal hygiene and coupon stockpiling extras. It feels good knowing.

In all of my years of thinking myself frugal. I've never truly tracked where the money goes. I just always tried to make sure everything was discounted. I’ll keep tracking. The goal is to live well for less.
Do you track your spending? If so, how do you keep the spending under control in each catagory? Ever tried cash in envelopes? What about computer software?

Money Tracking Monday

2010-03-15T04:17:00.001-04:00

Poverty and shame shall be to him that refuseth instruction: but he that regardeth reproof shall be honoured. (Pro 13:18)

It's Monday, I should be rested but I stayed up too late on Sunday for that.

The meals were planned (I’ll come back to this) and the week is mapped out in my planner.

This is Monday Clean Up Day. We give the house a thorough cleaning. Everyone has their area and list.

Tuesday I do laundry, water plants and bake. This Tuesday we are going on a field trip. I’ll adjust.

Wednesday, I try to get control of my mail, bills, correspondence and paper. Hence, I call it “Desk Day”

Thursday is for shopping. My grandparents used to shop every Thursday. It reminds me of them, I like it.

Friday we wrap up school and go to the library and run errands.

Saturday I rest

Sunday I plan again.

That’s a typical week.

I can’t tell you how much this weekly routine helps keep order and peace. In addition to the weekly days, we have routines, nothing fancy, just rituals each day that I try to ENGRANE in my kids to ~~brainwash~~ help them remember important steps throughout the day. It keeps the house tidy and organized. Like this before breakfast routine: “when your feet hit the floor, make your bed, brush your teeth, wash your face, dress and tidy the bathroom.”

I ~~drill~~ lovingly remind them all day - every - day to teach them to prioritize. I call that being the “Chore Police.” One day I hope they will get it. Today I hope they see the importance of routines, planning, budgeting and discipline. “We don’t have any food,” one whined as we cleaned up the dishes after oven roasted chicken, cabbage and potato salad. Another sighed, “Ugh, finally a meal!” It really is funny to see how spoiled they are. Yes, we are out of eggs, white wheat, syrup, oats, and cereal and to them that’s everything essential that makes everything they love. But we could eat the rest of the week (I think) with a little creativity and less whining. But where is the food? We have ice cream, and I shopped three days instead of one!

Last week things were a little off. I shopped too much, too often, spent too much on too little and now we have exactly that to show for it. Ironically last week at Balancing Beauty and Bedlam I recalled the title of a post: Lower Your Grocery Budget by Tracking your Food Expenses. Good info!

I am a frugal shopper and couponer, but I don’t track expenses. Only to complain and tell anyone who will listen how much gas I’ve bought in the last few days. When I really track that expense I know I’ll park it for a few days.

I printed my bank statement, and I’m tracking my spending. I’m also re-planning that menu. It was dependent on an emergency trip to the store today. I’ll track before I do anything to see where we are and get some input on where we go from here. To shop, or not to shop. This is going to be a powerful object lesson in consumer math.

Commitment - A Living Sacrifice

2010-03-12T14:09:00.000-05:00

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. (Rom 12:1-2)

Have you ever noticed when you make changes you think are for the best, either in how you spend money, or what to eat, or where you go, or how you manage your time the forces align to thwart your good intentions.

I always preface questions about our diet by saying "we aren't purest." Meaning (sarcastically) no, we aren't diehard committed to it, we do this as long as it's affordable and convenient. And when the budget gets tight, organic meat is the first to go.

I have changed my families food choices and my husband supports the changes. Many of them he initiated. But the cost and the effort requires a level of commitment that makes me have to work a little harder, explain, say no, say wait or eat at home. Normally that's what I do. But, I always have to be planning to stay one step ahead of life.

I want to glorify God in my body as well as in my spirit. I believe that the Word going IN should make impact on the hidden person of the heart but those changes should also manifest OUTwardly as well. So I can't ignore that my physical body is an important part of my OUTward walk. But sometimes I compromise. Perhaps too much!

But this is not just about me and my body, my children are developing their own body consciousness, food preferences and habits from the lessons I teach or fail to teach.

Am I being too fanatical, should I relax, enjoy my liberty and "LIVE a LITTLE?"

I recently read about Peter's denial of Christ. That moment resonated with me . . . that feeling - at that awful moment when you hear the cock crow and realize you've become a statistic in the compromise hall of shame. When you stood with an opportunity to do right, but did the very thing you said you would not do . . . again.

In my commitment to live a healthier life, and to teach my family the importance of eating right, its so easy to be derailed by life's occasions to indulge, or take a shortcut. And instead of saying no I say "what the heck - lets live, everyone need a break."

I admire people who honor the commitment to their health to the point where there is no compromise worth the cost. And there are cost. . . The risk of diabetes, high blood pressure, obesity headaches, compromised immune function, etc.

I admire an old friend who, in order to give herself a fighting chance against cancer, committed to a strict cleansing diet of healing juices. She chose life over indulgence.

When I feel the throb of a food related headache, I can hear the cock crowing.

When I look in rear view mirror at orange fingertips feeding happy faces , I can hear the cock crowing.

I know there is a healthy balance; a middle ground between fanatical and taking no thought for tomorrow. That's the place I want to live - without guilt.

Loving Father, help me present myself as a living sacrifice to you. Help me renew my thinking and not conform to this world. Teach me what is good, and acceptable and perfect according to your will.

Whole Wheat Bread Made Easy

2010-03-11T01:21:00.001-05:00

Give us this day our daily bread. (Mat 6:11)

For many years I've tried to master fresh whole wheat bread. God packaged so much life into living grains and as long as they are unbroken they are full of life giving nutrients. Once milled, they immediately begin to degrade. One of my favorite sources for information on the benefits of fresh milled wheat bread is Bread Beckers.

I thought I would never perfect my bread until I had the mother of all bread machines, the Zojirushi or an Electrolux mixer to knead the dough and a Wonder Mill to grind the wheat.

Kneading is time consuming and you can't take shortcuts. The Mixers and machines were too pricey. Mills grind a lot of wheat quickly but they are pricey too.

I borrowed a Wondermill and compared the flour to what I was able to grind in my Vitamix. Wondermill grinds a lot of grain all at once, simply fill the mill and turn it on. But it takes up more counter space than I'm willing to give up and only does one thing - grind wheat. I decided to forego the mill and use my Vitamix. I have to grind in small batches about 1-1 1/2 cups at a time but the flour is perfect, and the Vitamix does a lot more jobs in the kitchen while taking up very little space. (Vitamix makes a dry blade cup for grinding grain, nuts, and coffee) The liquid cup isn't recommended for dry foods.

As for the mixer: The pricey ones sold by bread baking supply companies say that wheat dough is heavier than white and only the strongest mixers and bread machines can hold up to the demands of whole wheat. However, my friend was turning out perfect loaves in a regular bread machine by Sunbeam. I ask her how long it lasted, she said years, and for the price she didn’t mind replacing it. So I found a Bread Man and a Sunbeam at a yard sale for $15 each. They each have a dough cycle for mixing, kneading and rising. It’s been about two or three years and they are still holding up. If they do fail, there's a steady of supply of them out there at yard sales and thrift stores practically new in the box.

Add ingredients into the machine.

First the wet

Then the dry - yeast on top.

Start dough cycle They rise out of the machine so I check them near the end (approx 1 hour). Dump the dough, remove the mixing paddle, and divide into two loaves.

Shape into loaf pans sprayed with cooking spray. Let them rise for about 1 hour in a warm moist place (I prefer the microwave with a cup of hot water)

Honey Wheat Bread

14 oz water

2 Tbs oil or butter

1/2 c honey

1Tbs wheat gluten

2 tsp salt

4 c wheat flour

2-3 tsp yeast (I use 3)

Into a bread machine, add the ingredients in order, press start. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes. (all ovens vary) Makes 2 loaves.

If you have a bread machine dig it out. If not, ask around. Someone has one collecting dust on its way to a yard sale. Enjoy, but go easy on the butter!!!!!

Break Every Yoke

2010-03-05T20:14:00.000-05:00

Is not this the fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke? . . . Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the LORD shall be thy reward. Isa 58:6, 8

YOKE, noun - 1. A piece of timber, hollowed or made curving . . . receiving the necks of oxen; by which means two are connected for drawing. 2. A mark of servitude; slavery; bondage. 3. A chain; a link; a bond of connection; as the yoke of marriage. 4. A couple; a pair; as a yoke of oxen. 5. Service.

YOKE, verb- 1. To put a yoke on; to join in a yoke; as, to yoke oxen, or a pair of oxen. 2. To couple; to join with another. 3. To enslave; to bring into bondage. 4. To restrain; to confine.

The hard truth: Anything that we are bound to, in service to, and enslaved by is a YOKE. Two yoked together are always bound to go in the same direction at the same time no matter what the individual wants.

Perhaps you can understand, perhaps you can’t.

Fasting exposed the countless calories consumed unconsciously.

Every moment of the day that finds a lull was inextricably filled with food.

A little munch here, a little munch there.

A taste

A sample

Boredom

Bondage

My flesh screams, my hand reaches and draws back in shame.

I open the refrigerator, and then slam it shut in disbelief.

I had no idea.

What does a mouth do when it’s not talking? Or Sleeping? If it’s YOKED to food - Chew!

“God, forgive me for this weakness of my flesh. Set me free. Break this yoke!”

September began our season of back to back birthdays followed by the holidays and lots of snow snacking. In a family like ours thats a lot of good food. To one who loves good food it’s a long fall off the wagon. It may be too soon to say I am free. But, I’m walking it out one day at a time. Prayerfully.

Quenching Waters

2010-03-03T23:38:00.003-05:00

Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well. (Pro 5:15)

The proverbial "strange woman" aka the other woman is a crafty seductress - we can learn from her!
She hunts for young men, calls for them, entices them, and then snares them. She prepares her body, her hair, her face and her bed for their pleasure. This woman is on a mission and she is after our men.

Think Christian men can’t be fooled by her? She not the harlot you picture of old, nor is she a “street walker.” No, she is a working girl, she needs a ride, or help with a project, she needs prayer or something done around the house, she’s the secretary, maybe the boss, or a stay at home who appreciates his humor, or his handyman skills. She smiles and laughs at his jokes, she makes him feel ten feet tall affirming but never demanding . . . you get the picture.

Here’s some counsel I gleaned from wise women who have had a tremendous impact on my life. I pass it along in hopes that it will bless you as it has blessed me.

• The same things you did to get them you have to do to keep them. Fight the frump! Put some effort into our appearance - don’t get slack because you’ve got ‘em. Put on some make up and fix your hair every day, get a makeover for a fresh new look. Put on some decent clothes and stop letting him see you slumming around the house.

• Keep is love tank full! The strange woman says “let’s take our fill of love until morning” (Prov7:18) Make sure he has nothing left to give . . . need I say more.

• “What kind of underwear are you wearing?” – I know, I thought the same thing when the question was posed to me. Keep them pretty, feminine and in good condition. It does wonders for your self esteem and does not go unnoticed.

• Don’t be a boring old book on the same page – I heard this over 15 years ago on a radio interview – would you want to pick up a book and read the same page every day, day in and day out. That’s what coming home to a wife in a rut is like. The other woman is a fresh new page in an exciting book. We have to stay active, engaged in learning, and our conversation more than domestics. Though this is our first call, our minds are capable of more. Don’t be so predictable and stale.

• Listen to what he does not say – pay attention to his responses to colors, styles, and scents and remember what makes him smile, do a double take, or linger longer in a hug.

• Learn his love language - Watch how he shows love – that’s his love language. Learn to speak it.

• Take care of yourself – Don’t be a marriage martyr; humbly sacrificing your identity on the altar of domestic duty. At the risk of sounding humanistic you must love yourself and respect the unique woman God made you to be. Take care of your mind, body and soul. Set boundaries to protect your heart. A man respects a woman who commands respect for herself.

• Smile at him

• Listen to him

• Let him dream

The more I make him the happy the happier he makes me!

Are you keeping the cistern filled?

Photo credit : Danilo Rizzuti / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Prayer in MY Marriage

2010-03-02T00:51:00.000-05:00

I would like to report that the Big Guy and I pray daily. I would like to report that whenever we have decisions that we immediately come together on our knees. I would like to say that we have built this family and our relationship on the solid rock of prayer . . . not exactly

My prayer life and relationship with God developed within the context of a tumultuous young marriage. On the surface it didn’t appear that way but we both did a lot of growing up together. We learned to be adults, parents and partners in a very short time. So many blogger profiles say “married to my best friend. . . “ That’s a beautiful beginning. But that’s not my testimony. By the Grace of God, my husband is becoming my best friend. We’ve worked at this relationship, we both had to do a lot of dying, and crying and we’ve weathered a lot of storms to get to this point. I thank God that today we are still together, finally communicating and happy. But we have very different love languages with each other and with God.

When the Big Guy is home for dinner, he prays over our meals. Every heart bows with reverence - he speaks with such authority and my heart melts within me. Oh how he touches God’s throne. . . I love to hear him pray!

Prayer for me is like pouring out your emotions at the throne of God. I’d join hands and get gushy like that with him every day. It would be beautiful to me. Talking is how I love, it’s how I cope, it’s how I heal, it is my therapy! Words are my love language. I love them! But, my husband isn’t bent that way. He’s expressive but concise.

The truth is. . . My husband and I pray together when the urge hits and one of us says “wanna pray?” We pray together when we need something. We pray together when we are standing at the Red Seas of life needing a parting of the waters. But we don’t have a consistent prayer life together.

Prayer in MY marriage is. . .

Me standing in the gap - to watch, look well, be sober and to be vigilant. To be discerning and aware and praying for my family and my house.
Me discerning my husband’s moods, his needs, his heart, his hopes and his fears and praying FOR Him if not WITH him.
Me creating an atmosphere of peace, praise and worship so that when the Big Guy does kneel beside me in prayer or gather our children to pray, or prays a beautiful prayer of thanksgiving over our meals that his words will resonate to heaven, be affirmed in our hearts and established in our house.
Trusting that he still prays for us in his own way and in his own time; and when we do come together and pray God hears us and mountains move.

This and That

2010-02-26T06:53:00.000-05:00

Marriage Monday! Prayer in Marriage

This month, by special request our group topic is "Prayer in Marriage." Please join us for Marriage Monday on Mar. 1, 2010. You're free to approach this subject any way you wish. Give your entry a title and let the Spirit lead you as you write.

A Few Writing Suggestions

It's no secret that many couples have difficulty praying together. Men, especially, can be uncomfortable expressing their intimate spiritual thoughts. What have you learned to that helps you both to break through those barriers?

Consider sharing your experience in one or more of these areas...

• When do you pray as a couple

• Frequency of prayer

• Why you don't pray

• Answers to your prayers

• Prayer partners for your marriage

• Praying for your children

• Rewards of praying together

• Prayer for your husband's salvation

...and so on. Maybe you would simply prefer to post a prayer instead.

See you on Monday!

Swag Bucks – If you aren't Swaggin’ click here and start. Download the tool bar. Earn swag bucks for searching the net with the swagbuck search engine. It’s that simple. Enter the site or key word, search and swag bucks awards “bucks” for random search entries. The bucks can be traded in for prizes, gift cards, pay pal cash or entries in drawings.

I use the swag buck tool bar to search even if I have the site saved as a favorite because I never know when I’ll “search and win” and I usually win every time I’m at my desk.

Beautiful Bloggers

2010-02-25T14:18:00.000-05:00

How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him that bringeth good tidings, that publisheth peace; that bringeth good tidings of good, that publisheth salvation; that saith unto Zion, Thy God reigneth! Isa 52:7

Because I received a beautiful blogger award I have the honor of awarding the same to seven beautiful bloggers.

His Grace to Me – a creative, resourceful, kindred blog sister. I just love reading about her homeschooling, gardening and life adventures.

Breathing Grace - wise and insightful; always pushing me to edge of my comfort to ponder the weightier issues of life in Christ.

True Hearts Marriage - a marriage blog dedicated to sharing practical solutions to restore and enhance your marriage. This blog keeps it REAL!

Eternal Kiss of Love – a beautiful blogger indeed from a soul that Loves the Lord and His people.

Time Well Spent – another beautiful blogger who I love for her simplicity and beautiful photos. Thanks Becca for your kind comments and encouragement.

Beholding Him, Domestic Serenity and Health Home and Happiness I just couldn’t pick a seventh! I love these ladies for their creativity, and commitment to their home, their children, homeschooling, healthy living and to God.

Now you ladies get to post this award on your blog, with seven interesting things about yourself, then give the award to seven bloggers.

Guest Post: Ending a Love Affair

2010-02-24T12:16:00.001-05:00

Bad Eating Habits

I remember when I was appropriately 60lbs over weight. I think a lot of things contributed to my weight gain, consciously and subconsciously. I had health challenges and I was not in the place that I wanted to be financially and occupationally. Those things weighed on me heavily.

When I wanted to be comforted one of my choices was food. Sweets were my bosom buddy. In the day time we danced and at night we rested together. A nice large piece of chocolate cake was welcomed at my door anytime. As I think back when I was young I remember being rewarded with “Susie Q” cup cakes. Fried chicken was a prize. And if mash potatoes were served we had to have gravy.

I think that good eating habits start at home. An introduction to a balanced meal with much fruit and veggies are of great value to our children.

Love Affair with Food

I had to end that love affair that I had with food. It stole the better part of me. However, sometimes I felt powerless and paralyzed when it came to losing weight. Frustration filled my heart. Often it felt like it was a battle that I didn’t have the power to win.

And as a Christian, back then, I felt that I had no one to talk to regarding this matter. Because often times we don’t want to deal with our human side. The lie is that we are not supposed to be challenged with issues. But, Jesus had a human side. In one of His human moments: “He went on a little farther and fell face down on the ground, praying, “My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will, not mine.” (Mat.26:39)

Often times we go into denial regarding the issues that we face but God did not call us to denial He called us to truth. Someone said, “You cannot change what you do not acknowledge.” And I am in total agreement with that. I would like to take that statement a little further and say, “If you don’t deal with it, it will deal with you. Whatever your it is, Selah. One of the principles of deliverance is confession: 9) “For if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10) For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved. (Romans 10:9-10)

Confessing the truth about our relationship with food is the start to freedom when divorcing bad habits pertaining to food. To Be Continued. . .

Penny Miller,
True Hearts Marriage Covenant
Restore, Enhance and Maintain: True Hearts exist for the purpose of building strong Marriages. Inspiring couples through biblical truths and practical application.

Beautiful Blog Award

2010-02-22T23:23:00.001-05:00

I am humbled. . .

I've been given a beautiful blog award.

Thank you, Jaime, for thinking of me.

For acknowledging my little path off the net.

And calling it a worthy place to stop.

To bad our visits are virtual.

Our communication only through keystrokes.

We all have real lives away from this screen,

But our world is made larger by the many
Kindred souls we meet online.

Seven interesting things about me? To ordinary people they might be interesting but to the bloggers I know it’s all in a day’s work! Here we go:

In my life before twins I was a DECORATOR
Before any kids at all - an ARTIST.
I love laughter and joy and peace!
I spent the last 20 years growing up, and I'm finally feeling fabulous and fierce at 40ish.
In my life after homeschooling I want to get a master’s degree and start a non-profit for adult education.
In whatever time is left I want to write a book.
I dream of being able to grow all of my own vegetable and herbs.

This Beautiful Blogger award was given to me by Jaime at Ditchin the Kitchen. Who patiently and transparently shares her heart to encourage those of on our weight loss journey. I will follow up with a post to pass this award on to seven beautiful bloggers.

Complaceny and Contentment

2010-02-20T01:55:00.000-05:00

Now godliness with contentment is great gain. 1Timothy 6: 6

In a recent family Bible study I asked my children if they understood the meaning of complacency. They did . . . I called on my 9 year old who said, "not wanting to change things." Good answer I said, then I continued to probe. "So then what is contentment?"

"And it shall come to pass at that time That I will search Jerusalem with lamps, And punish the men Who are settled in complacency, Who say in their heart, 'The Lord will not do good, Nor will He do evil.' Zephaniah 1: 12

Of course, contentment is when we are happy with what whatever state we are in. That's a good thing. Complacency, on the other hand; is unwillingness to change what should be changed. Zephaniah’s definition was shocking to me: men who say in their heart, "The Lord will not do good, nor will he do evil." When we read on, the consequences were devastating. I trembled. . .

Is that the same as doing things we know are not pleasing in His sight and thinking "nothing will happen?" Is that what's happening when we excuse bad behavior and compromise and file it under "grace" or "liberty" when it belongs in "idolatry" or "sin."

Sometimes I am comfortable with my life in Christ, content with MY liberty under HIS grace. But sometimes I'm thinking oh no, "He is not playin' with me, I need to get my act together."

My dad used to say, “If you were tried in court for being a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you?" I suppose if you spy on me or tap my phone I'd give myself away sooner or later.

At a glance, I don’t look like a Christian - of any particular distinguishable kind . . . I'm not Amish, not Mennonite, not Holiness Pentecostal, not a nun, don't have long hair, don’t' wear long skirts. But I am . . . I am trying to be a Christian, trying to set myself apart and teach my children to do so. I am trying to live in this world and not be of this world.

There are so many extremes and levels of devotion and interpretation; and raising children, especially once they are teens is like walking a minefield of choices. Secular music, movies, clothes . . . how far do we go - or not go? Is dowdy Godly, is stylish worldly. Is long hair glorifying, is short hair not? Which kind of music does the Lord approve?
Will compromise and shades of grey cause my children to stumble and become a millstone around our neck? This one needs prayer, discernment and the divine guidance of The Holy Spirit. Any thoughts?

Watch and be Sober

2010-02-16T01:29:00.007-05:00

Therefore let us not sleep, as do others; but let us watch and be sober. 1Th 5:6

It is easy to be lulled into complacency.
If we aren't careful little foxes are digging, biting and spoiling the vines.
Ruining the tender grapes we'd hope to harvest.
Our enemy is sowing tares among our wheat. . .
Wake up!

We, the Keepers of our homes, have been given an awesome charge.
Look well to the ways of our house.
To Build it and keep it!
To be sober and watch!
With this expectation God equipped us for the challenge.
Do you realize we have a spiritual radar?
A woman's intuition
A still small voice
A gut feeling

Men say
We are too emotional
Too worried about details
Sweatin' the small stuff
over concerned, overreacting, over thinking, overstepping, overly-dramatic. . .

Prudence is cautious, conscientious, circumspect, practical,wise and foresees by intuition . . . and a Prudent Wife is from the LORD. (Pro 19:14)

This word came forth in a recent fellowship of women dedicated to praying for our families.

"We have authority over our home, and by God's law we can mandate what happens in our house."

"We must take that authority and create an atmosphere of praise and worship."

"We must be consistent in our prayer, worship and study before our children, unbelieving, or luke warm spouses, and our enemy who is lurking outside the door.

"We must anoint our children, pray for them, and bless them every day."

Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walks about, seeking whom he may devour . 1Pe 5:8

For His Glory

2010-02-14T12:29:00.010-05:00

But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.
(Mat 4:4)

After all of this talk about healthy organic whole food. How did I end up overweight with high blood pressure. . . A lifetime of food centered living.

I had headaches all of my life, then a couple of my children began suffering from them early in theirs. So I learned to cook from scratch. I've spent the last 15 years perfecting our family and restaurant favorites without boxed, prepared, processed ingredients. Pure and natural, rich and delicious.

Our diet is whole wheat, rich in vegetables and grains, all natural, unprocessed, nitrate free but often too rich, too sweet, too fat and too much.

Natural, home made food from scratch saves money and is better for you. I have preached that for years and will continue to do so. However, the love affair must end.

I have learned to live life through the food. Every occasion has its food. Even snow and the Superbowl. I learned from my mother and grandmothers and my children from me. Our traditions are built around our foods. We celebrate, mourn and fill boredom with food. Food becomes a habit, an obsession, an idol.

I don't mean to say the traditions are bad. Most people in the family are fine. It's my vice that's the problem. Not every member of a wine drinking family becomes an alcoholic either. But I clearly have a problem and 60lbs to prove it.

I've teamed up with a kindred blogger at Ditchin' the Kitchen and one of my sister LifeGivers at True Hearts for their support to end this relationship and break its stronghold. I will follow up with a series of guest post to promote Health & Fitness for His Glory.

Life Unplugged

2010-02-10T07:30:00.011-05:00

She is not afraid of snow for her household; for all her household is clothed with scarlet Proverbs 31: 21

It seems the things that should make life better, choke the life out of living.

Before technology God provided for our NEEDS and gave us simple pleasures.

We just have to be still, notice, and appreciate.

He is present - we just can't hear Him through the noise?

We are present - but are we listening to each other?

Or texting, typing, and tuning out out on i-tunes.

Our power outage was precious.

We worked together boiling snow water and tending the fire because suddenly it really mattered.

We played trivia Q&A by candlelight, and cast shadows on the wall.

I enjoyed my kids voices, their laughter and their company.

I needed their comfort and their help.

The Big Man braved the cold and snow to work

So I don't have to - Thanks Baby!

We survived alone - my dad would have been proud - he taught me well . . . so much so that. . .

We unplugged one more night and reminisced by lamplight.

And cuddled in the family room, as if for the warmth, but really for comfort.

Oh, that we could unplug more often.

What did they do before life on the plug? I'll bet they lived life to the fullest.

Fully seeing and hearing God and each other!

Temptation

2010-02-05T21:04:00.007-05:00

No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.

Therefore. . .

1 Corinthians 10:13

God is promising that He is faithful and that He will to make a way of escape, so we will be able to bear temptation. To Bear - to support or sustain without sinking or yielding; to endure.

Does this apply to the temptation to indulge in promiscuity, to smoke, or drink, or use drugs? Does this mean the temptation to abuse food without self control. Is there a difference?

We encourage the use and abuse of food. We celebrate with food, we remember with food, and fellowship around food, we comfort with food, and we mourn with food. Idle hands lay hold of food, and boredom beacons it to fill the time. No one gasp in disbelief as they would if we were shooting or smoking something that couldn't be purchased legally, or taking yet another lover to our bed. Any Christian could openly indulge and overindulge without the shame or fear of judgement to this drug of choice. Right?

Yet we have this promise that we don't have to yield to temptation, we can BEAR it. Read the context: This promise is written about the 1st generation Israelites that came out of Egypt. God was not pleased with them. They lusted after evil things, became idolaters, they ate, drank, and played, they committed sexual immorality, tempted Christ, complained and their bodies where scattered in the wilderness because of it. So we are warned that they are our example - to be careful or else when we think we stand we fall (1 Corinthians 10:5-12). . . because there is no temptation that has overtaken us that God's faithfulness can't help us to bear. HE MAKES A WAY OF ESCAPE. Therefore. . .

Before and beyond the promises there are usually warnings or conditions. (When you see therefore, you should always look to see what it's there for)

1 Corinthians 10: 14 - Therefore, my beloved, flee from idolatry.

1 Corinthians 10: 15 - I speak as to wise men; judge for yourselves what I say.

Is succumbing to temptation idolatry? If I'm wise will I get it? Do I already know the answer in my heart? What are we to do in world that celebrates eating, while food is an irresistible drug to so many?

Re-Committed

2010-02-04T11:53:00.006-05:00

Commit thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts shall be established. Prov 16: 3

I presumed that I would make plans, and commit them to the Lord. But commit, I’m learning, is more than just asking HIS blessing upon MY plans.

A closer look reveals commit means:
To give in charge or trust
To deliver for safekeeping
To put officially in custody
To pledge, bind, or engage

An even closer look from Strong’s: to roll (literally or figuratively): - commit, remove, roll (away, down, together) . . .trust . . .

So then to commit is to roll away, together, as in from one person to another, to entrust. Perhaps I should rethink what it means to commit my works – And instead cast my cares on Him, who is more capable, and rest in His ability, with assurance that my ways will be established by Him and thus successful.

Psa 37:5 Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.

Surely this isn't a licence to stop planning and leave the managing of my life to a willy nilly chasing of the wind - no, I think for me it means giving Him – NOT JUST THE PLANS once I'm finished with them – BUT THE PLANNING. Trusting Him(giving Him charge, and official custody) to set my steps in order according to His perfect will and His plan for my purpose.

Committed

2010-02-01T05:55:00.008-05:00

All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, But the LORD weighs the spirits. Commit your works to the LORD, And your thoughts will be established . . . When a man's ways please the LORD, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him. . . A man's heart plans his way, But the LORD directs his steps.(Proverbs 16:2-3,7,9)

Snow slows things down. It makes you sit still and reflect. Gazing out at the pure brightness of it. Imagining His Countenance. Wishing for a visitation. I'm so thankful that I'm warm and thankful that I'm safe; but I'm restless when I should be embracing the rest. . . so much to do.

Lately, I'm marching to the wrong beat - out of sync -I'm stepping but I can't catch up, shuffling paces behind stepping left when I should be on the right and stepping right when I should be on the left. Every aspect of my life is slightly off . . .

School is happening . . . but distracted

Chores are getting done . . . but not with diligence

Exercise happens . . . when nothing else does

Meals are . . . planned but not with the same thought

So I prayed for order to return. . . asked my sisters to pray for me. I woke at 5am Monday ready to take on the day - like I used to. I felt the Lord on my side. But then my tummy rumbled and churned and I couldn't go on; so I laid down again with a cup of stomach calming ginger/lemongrass tea. It worked. My day began at 10:00am - 5 hours late!!!

Late breakfast, late Bible study, late school, late lunch, late dinner, incomplete Monday clean up, incomplete school, incomplete meal plan, incomplete laundry, bed unmade. What a day!

Buuuut we did eat, we did pray, we did study the word, we did school. . . aaaaand we can cleanup tomorrow, meals are planned at least until Thursday, laundry never ends anyway sooooo I think I'll jump back in the bed and try again tomorrow.

I won't give up, I will commit this new day to God. I'll let Him have it. I'll ask Him to order my steps and establish my priorities. Things will be different in His hands.

Commit : To give in trust; to put into the
hands or power of another; to entrust; with to.
Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.
(Psa 37:5-6)

SABBATH Reflection

2010-01-30T11:20:00.005-05:00

I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine . . .Song of Solomon 6:3

Praise God for another Sabbath of Rest. I will enjoy the fresh falling snow and warm thoughts of my beloved who braved the cold and wind before sunrise so I don't have to.

Drop a LOVE DROP on your sweetheart this weekend and thank him for all he does for you. Visit True Hearts for a daily dose of LOVE DROP inspiration. Jeff and Penny have a great post today, sharing how they are showing love on this countdown.

21 Day Valentine's Day Countdown

2010-01-25T22:31:00.010-05:00

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. (Gen 2:24-25)

GUEST POST:
What does Valentine’s Day represent for you? Well, for me it is an opportunity to celebrate my love for the man that I committed to 23 years ago. It is an opportunity to join with others who decide to celebrate their covenant love. A day when the world stops to say, “Will You Be My Valentine.”

We would like for you to join us in a 21 day Valentine Count Down. Only if Valentines Day could be exhibited every day in our homes, wouldn’t that be fantastic? Let’s work on it.

I know we all are busy. There never seems to be enough time in the day. But we must take time to nurture our covenant love. Starting today through Feb. 14, 2010 begin to drop some unexpected love drops on your spouse. What do I mean by that? Here are some suggestions:

• Do not allow a day to go by without saying, “ I love you”
• Take the time to touch him/her when they leave home and when they return
• Make sure you kiss hello and goodbye
• While out if you have the opportunity grab her hand or his
• Give him/her a call during work hours, just to say,” hello” (If possible)
• Give him/her a compliment
• Write him/her a note
• Ask him/her to pray for you
• Ask him/her to pray with you
• Schedule special time together
• Ask him/her do they need help with cleaning the house or with the kids
• Stop and give an unexpected hug
• Put the kids to sleep and invite him/her to go to bed early
• Be romantic towards your spouse
• Let them know that you care ( be a good listener )
• Take time to communicate (not just about responsibilities)
• Laugh

These are a few suggestions to enhance and ignite covenant love and intimacy.

The Goal
At the climax of 21 days, Valentine’s Day; our goal is to develop a greater level of intimacy and appreciation for one another. And hopefully we both will be at a place where we can celebrate our decision to love, honor and respect one another, in covenant love. Every Monday we will be sharing tidbits to enhance and ignite our covenant love.

We would love to have feedback from you during the 21 day count down.

Enjoy!
Jeff & Penny Miller
True Hearts Marriages

Join me and True Hearts Marriages as we celebrate our covenant. Some expressions of love are tried and true favorites - the little gestures that go along way in keeping our love alive. Sometimes you gotta think outside the box. Let's remind each other and be inspired. Share your romantic recipes, sweet surprises, intimate inspirations, or what ever you are doing to re-ignite the fire and show your love. Tracey

CLICK "COMMENTS" LINK BELOW TO SHARE AND READ WHAT OTHERS ARE DOING.

SABBATH

2010-01-23T12:30:00.002-05:00

You have turned my mourning into dancing for me; You have torn off my sackcloth, and have clothed me with gladness,
(Psa 30:11)

Coffee. . . Soda. . . Kombucha?

2010-01-21T01:09:00.004-05:00

Sleepy morning . . . coffee. . . sluggish afternoon. . . sugar. . .sleepless night. . . repeat.

I love coffee - but I used to need coffee. Many years ago I quit cold turkey because I knew I was addicted. I could tell by the headache that would come without fail if I didn't have a cup in the morning. I still enjoy coffee as a treat but I really don't want to depend on it to function. Once in a while I slip back into the rut; so sluggish and lethargic that I can't keep my eyes open without it. That's when I know something is wrong with my diet (more on that later). There are energizing drinks that are alternatives to coffee, tea and soda.

My favorite coffee alternative is an herbal coffee called Teechino made from roasted herbs, grains, fruits and nuts. It smells like coffee, brews like coffee but does not have any coffee or caffeine. It's available at health food stores.

"Teeccino offers a number of health benefits:

Naturally caffeine-free - no processing, no chemical residues
High in heart-healthy potassium
Natural energy boost - from nutrients, not stimulants
Alkaline - helps reduce acidity and restore alkaline balance
Rich in inulin, a soluble fiber in chicory root, that helps improve digestion and elimination plus increases the absorption of calcium and minerals"

Another favorite energizing drink is Kombucha: I know it's not pretty but its good and good for you (some of my friends and family disagree and can't stand the sight of it). Kombucha is a fermented tea that found its way from the far east across Russia in the early 1800's. The "thing" floating on top is a symbiotic colony of bacteria and yeast (SCOBY). The liquid is organic black tea and sugar. The tea ferments for 7 days, the colony (or culture) digest the sugar and tea and the result is a fizzy drink that has a slight apple cider vinegar twang.

Here are some of the benefits:

#1 for me is energy all day without the crash.
contains a range of B vitamins
Vitamin C
probiotics as in yogurt
promotes health by helping your body heal itself
aids liver detox
flushes kidneys
balances digestive system, improves flora
vitamins, enzymes, acids
helps process fats and proteins
immune booster
enhances vitality
balances Ph

Kombucha does different things for different people and some think its a cure-all tonic. It is not. It does help restore balance and helps the body heal itself. I like it for its refreshing natural fizz and the all day energy it provides.

Kombucha is available in stores that sell natural and organic foods, costing about $4 for 12 oz. Obtain a SCOBY and you can have it every day of the month for the price of a box of organic teabags and sugar.

NOTE: I can not validate these health benefits and I am not prescribing this as a cure for any condition. Please seek your own doctor's opinion to treat any medical condition you may have.

Plan Your Work and Work Your Plan!

2010-01-18T22:14:00.007-05:00

A wise woman builds her house, but the foolish plucks it down with her hands.

(Pro 14:1)

"Not only by her fruitfulness . . .but by her good housewifery, prudent economy; looking well to the ways of her household; guiding the affairs of her house with discretion; keeping all things in a good decorum; and bringing up her children in virtue, and in the fear and admonition of the Lord." (Gill)

My mother-in-law, who past away in October of 1999 was a wise women, and I loved to glean from her. Like my father, she was a storehouse of useful information and wisdom. She gave me this jewel and it hasn't failed me, "IF YOU FAIL TO PLAN, YOU PLAN TO FAIL." She also used to say "PLAN YOUR WORK AND WORK YOUR PLAN."

What a wealth of insight is contained in those words. The opposite of build is tear down or destroy. It is true, failing to plan meals = rushed, unbalanced meals and eating out. Failing to plan the week = forgotten appointments, late bills and disorder.

It's late on Monday and I can her loud and clear. So I tackle my desk, sort my mail and make a menu for the week. I will rest well tonight knowing the week is in order.

BREAKFAST: fruit & cereal, granola & yogurt parfaits, muffins w/fruit, oatmeal

LUNCH: salad, bean burritos, leftovers, chicken salad sandwiches

DINNERS: Monday – Chipotle style burritos
Tuesday – lasagna/salad
Wednesday – fish/cabbage/oven roasted potatoes
Thursday – chicken/penne w/steamed veggies
Friday – homemade whole wheat pizza w/turkey bacon

She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.
(Pro 31:27)

I'll be searching out your "Meal Plan Monday's" for quick, light lunch ideas.

Nourishing Immune Building Chicken Bone Broth

2010-01-14T22:53:00.009-05:00

Making food that is filling, flavorful and nutrient rich is my goal. With the right combination of real nourishing foods, I don't think there is a need for multi-vitamins and numerous supplements. But a mom with teens, picky twins, and a husband has to be creative to keep everybody filled, nourished and happy while keeping me free of temptation. Thankfully, God has given us everything we need. No middle man needs to process or package nutrients for us. I like to think of nourishing foods and herbs as provision from His Hand directly to mine.

And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat. (Gen 1:29)

Bone Broth is nothing new, my mom said her grandparents made chicken soup this way on the farm and included the chicken feet. I make this broth every week and use it for soup, vegetables, rice, beans or anything that requires cooking liquid. This is my version of Sally Fallon's recipe in Nourishing Traditions:

4 qts water
2 Tbsp. organic apple cider vinegar
1 whole chicken (head and feet if you can get them)
1 large onion, 2 peeled carrots, 3 stalks celery - coursely chopped
1 bunch fresh parsley (add for last 10 minutes of cooking)
I use a whole roaster without feet or head (preferably organic free-range) I also use a carcass when I've roasted a chicken for eating.
Bring to a boil, then simmer in a crockpot for 6 -24 hours.
The vinegar softens the bones and draws the minerals out of the bone and marrow.
Midway through the cooking add lots of garlic cloves.

Then add two heaping tablespoons each of burdock and dandelion root and simmer some more. These can be found at any health food store in the bulk herb section. This immune building addition to Fallon's recipe is from Krista at Forrest Green Farm.
I often start this at night, add garlic and roots in the morning and let it cook the rest of the day. When the bones are soft and the broth is golden I know its ready. (This recipe calls for addition of 1 bunch of fresh parsley, however I prefer to add fresh herbs to the finished soup or whatever I'm cooking.

The broth is strained and cooled. Then freeze it or use it within the week. The cooked meat that has fallen off the bones can be used in soup, chicken salad, BBQ chicken etc. It's a little too soft for my taste so I pull out the biggest firmest chunks and give the skin, small bones and remaning chicken to the dog. The addition of garlic and roots gives this healing soup an immune boosting kick. Enjoy!

The Army and the Arsenal of my War

2010-01-12T23:33:00.007-05:00

For some, this journey to better health is a matter of making better choices; for me it's a war with the flesh.

The war is waged between my own food needs (to have nothing sweet or salty in the house) and my family's desires for an occasional indulgence. Samples dot the grocery store isles like landmines, and TV commercials lay subliminal messages to go. . . buy. . . eat. I feel like a prisoner because of my inability to be exposed to food without being tempted. I live behind an curtain of can'ts, don'ts, and mirrors never letting me forget that I'm living to eat instead of eating to live. It is a weakness that's as incomprehensible as addiction.

And in like manner the Spirit also helps our infirmity: for we know not how to pray as we ought; but the Spirit himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered; and He that searches the hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God. (Rom 8:26-27)

Thankfully, I am not alone. I have the most powerful weapon in all of heaven and earth. The Holy Spirit, who helps in my weakness and makes intercession for me according the will of God and Jesus/Yeshua who understands and also makes intercession for me at the right hand of the Father.

For we do not have a high priest who cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities;but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. (Heb 4:15-16)

What is that help? My sister at True Hearts admonished me with some loving advice.

Get the family in the program - solicit their support
Get help from a professional trainer - to push me harder
Pick a plan! Follow it!
Fast and put the flesh under submission - its the only way to win.
My fellow "Lifegivers" who surround me with prayer and encouragement
My Husband who encourages and inspires me. . .

What's in my arsenal?

pray daily
read the word
exercise - no way around it
water - got to have it
rest - the cure for caffeine
shop the perimeter
shop fresh and colorful
oven/grill/steam
shop less - shop full
eat breakfast
journal

This info is from a Bible study program called First Place for Health.

Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.
(Rom 8:37

Balancing Fitness and Frugality

2010-01-09T00:27:00.004-05:00

One of the biggest frustrations in my years of trying to feed my family of seven good quality organic food, is cost! The better the quality the more it cost. Natural unprocessed foods cost more while the more processed and heart clogging the lower the cost.

I was planning to do the pantry challenge and clean our pantry, freezer, and stockpile before shopping because the stock pile is expiring and the freezer needs defrosting but that plan wasn't going to be the best for our health without some help. I had to buy fresh fruits and vegetables.

In looking back over the past few weeks to figure out why a few of us have had reoccurring headaches I realize that our holiday diet has been void of the fresh colorful variety it should have. The foods with the most antioxidants, minerals and vitamins are the ones with the richest darkest colors. We've had a few blueberries on waffles, and overcooked veggies on the side as an afterthought to our southern family favorites like ribs, fried chicken, potato salad etc. . . But its too easy to default to a diet that has its color ranges from cream to golden brown like pasta, potatoes, fried chicken and mmm chicken pot pie (below). So that has to change immediately.

In addition to the pantry challenge, the color/variety challenge - factor in frugality. It is Super Double Coupon week at Harris Teeter. If you know anything about couponing it can be good on the budget but it can net a lot of deals that don't make meals. Especially not healthy meals. So my challenge was to get the deals that fit in with my goals for our health and spend the savings on non-sale items we needed. Yeah, you see warm delights for my daughter; fortunately I don't like them. This shopping trip cost $55, down from $107.00 which was largely because of the organic produce, Advil, and cheese.

Here are some ways I get good quality for less.

Quail Cove Farms - Organic meat/produce/dairy/nuts/seeds/grains - I buy turkey bacon, and ground turkey meat, dried fruit, and sometimes grains from them. Their prices on meat are better than most. You must find a hostess to order from them.
Wholesale Coop- Together we purchase wholesale produce by the case and the price is as good and sometimes better than the stores. However most supermarkets are offering organic produce now and once in a while there are even coupons and sales.
Warehouse/Clubs - Costc, Bj's, Sams - all of their prices on produce aren't great, but on some organic produce items they have good deals.
Latter Day Saints Cannery - food storage staples like beans, rice, whole grains, dried milk. By far they have the best prices on grains, but I don't know if they are open non-members and I don't know if their products are organic. Contact them for locations near you. Click "Home Storage Order Form" for a list of products.
PLANT A GARDEN - You'd be surprised at how much you can grow in a square foot gardening or by planting edible landscaping plants even if you don't live on a farm.

In the end - we don't always eat organic. It's just too expensive so I choose the least processed, freshest food I can find. As for produce there are list of foods that are more likely to have pesticides - my rule is if its eaten -as is- I try to use organic, if it has thick skin and gets pealed away, then I save money.

The truth is: I can't loose weight and get healthy unless I change the way I shop and prepare food for my whole family. This has to be a lifestyle change for all of us to LIVE-it not a DIE-it just for me. So this is what I know to do, now the challenge is to do it!

If you have any suggestions on ways to balance frugality with fitness please share for all us to glean.

New Direction

2010-01-06T22:59:00.004-05:00

Howbeit when He, the Spirit of truth, is come, He shall guide you into all the truth: for He shall not speak from Himself; but what things soever He shall hear, these shall He speak: and He shall declare unto you the things that are to come. He shall glorify me: for He shall take of mine, and shall declare it unto you. (Joh 16:13-14)

I spent some time with the Holy Spirit reading and listening. Always inspired by the word, and always seeking inner peace and simplicity - I'm lead to turn in a new direction to narrow my focus for a while. Still INWARD, BUT FOCUSING ON OUTWARD RESULTS. The manifestation of the inner work is that the vessel glorifies God.

This is about my health and health of my family. For the past 10 years our eating and lifestyle has evolved. I began eliminating processed foods, and additives to prevent migraines. I started learning to cook from scratch, added nuts, seeds, organics, juicing, then on to whole grains and now herbs. (homemade is not low fat)It was around that time that our Pastor, my husband and some faithful brothers and sisters prayed over my daughter and I and God healed our migraines. I have been Migraine free since then. But I believe the diet changes kept them away. It was as though He "Go and sin more." And over indulging, excessive sweets and poor lazy eating habits is SIN.

Last year I started exercising and eating right after being diagnosed with high blood pressure. You could say I was "scared straight." Time to stop yo-yo-ing. I've been loosing - on and off. I have had good days and bad. I lost but gained some back during Christmas. I had a wonderful time with my family and wouldn't trade the memories we made, but its over. And now I'm left with the extra pounds, lack of energy, daily headaches, and cravings that won't quit.

For a season, I will ask you to walk with me in this journey. I invite your encouragement, tips, rebuke and accountability. I make this public so that I will no longer hide behind the pursuit of inward beauty as the only goal. I am His temple and in the end I want to be a vessel that glorifies God.

Or know ye not that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit which is in you, which ye have from God? and ye are not your own; for ye were bought with a price: glorify God therefore in your body. (1Co 6:19-20)

2010 Here We Go

2010-01-04T11:01:00.007-05:00

It's Monday so the holidays are officially over and it's time to get back to school and down to business. First on my list of "goals" is to ease back into school and chores routine and out of holiday mode, organized my desk, get a new planner, clean the house, and then work on the plans.

The plans include

lowering food & utilities bills - starting with eating from the pantry then

writing a healthy monthly menu plan (for the whole family)

finding a 6 week program or trainer to help me get back on track (to loose weight & lower blood pressure)

couponing and stockpiling (only the best deals only what we really need)

capitalize on online earning potential and freebies (as long as it's within the time and scope of what I'm already doing online)

That's what I want pass along today: I've been hearing about swagbucks for a while, but ignoring them as something I didn't have time to get into. I cant ignore it anymore. Many online money savers and frugals are saving big and some did all of their gift shopping with swag bucks.

In short, Swagucks is a tool bar and search engine. Use the search engine as you normally would google and earn Swagbucks (SB). Google is better and that's hard to compete with, but most of the sites you visit are easy to find. I use it even if its in my favorites and I earned 1 SB today for typing in the name of my bank. Just use SB first if it doesn't work - then Google it.

Redeem the SB's for online purchases at Amazon, Target, Walmart etc. or gift for cards to your favorite stores, or to enter drawings. Its free money! For instance I entered a drawing for $100 gift card from Target and it cost me 1 SB. You can purchase as many entries as you want. You can purchase MP3 or ITunes for around 15 SB per album. NOT BAD, huh!

Click on my button on the side bar over there or here to sign up. Once you sign up go to "SPECIAL OFFERS" and browse. Here's a couple I'm taking advantage of today:

STAMPS.COM is giving away $5 in free shipping at Stamps.Com for signing up for a free 4 week trial plus earn 75 swag bucks plus by going through Swagbucks at "SPECIAL OFFERS - FREE tab"

Snapfish is offering 50 prints for .50 cents with a code and 50 Free prints with your first upload here. In addition if you visit Snapfish through the swagbuck website (after you are signed up) at "SPECIAL OFFERS - MOST POPULAR tab" you will earn 45 swag bucks.

These are limited time offers so go now. Happy Swagging! and Happy New Year!

Tried By Fire

2009-12-31T00:04:00.010-05:00

The refining pot is for gold and the furnace for silver, but God tries the heart. Pro 17:3

The angel of the Lord appeared in the burning bush. Moses turned aside to see this great sight; how the bush burned but was not consumed. The Lord called out to him saying I AM HERE - TAKE OFF YOUR SHOES . . . THIS IS HOLY GROUND.Exo 3:2-5

Three boys went into the fiery furnace yet there were four. HE WAS THERE. What a great sight.

. . . grieving in manifold temptations; so that the trial of your faith (being much more precious than that of gold that perishes, but being proven through fire) might be found to praise and honor and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, (1Pe 1:6-7)

My life is Holy Ground, burning but not consumed. What a great sight. He is HERE! Trying my heart, trying my faith He refines and purifies with the fires of LIFE.

I recall this to my mind; therefore I hope. It is by the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. (Lam 3:21-23)

I faced the fiery furnace of afflictions and grief this year - His compassion did not fail. Though everything else failed. His compassion was new every morning, sustaining me, giving me just enough hope for each day - Great is His faithfulness!

Oh that there were another way to be purified and strengthened without fire. If only we could go AROUND and not THROUGH trials. But every seed that will produce life must fall the ground and die. Without grief we would not know such great rejoicing. If there had been no cross there would be no crown. If there had been no death there would be no resurrection.

As a difficult year comes to a close, I look back and I am awed by the great sight of it. We were burning but not consumed. We are whole, at peace and improved. This year I count it all joy to have trodden on Holy Ground!

My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith works patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that you may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing. (Jas 1:2-4)

Snow Day

2009-12-19T23:13:00.010-05:00

God thundereth marvellously with his voice; great things doeth he, which we cannot comprehend. For he saith to the snow, Be thou on the earth . . . (Job 37:5-6)

He maketh peace in thy borders . . . He giveth snow like wool: he scattereth the fost like ashes. He casteth forth his ice like morsels: who can stand before his cold? He sendeth out his word, and melteth them: he causeth his wind to blow, and the waters

flow. (Psa 147:14-18)

Wonderful Woods

2009-12-17T08:29:00.007-05:00

One winter afternoon, the boys and I set out on a nature hike to identify the trees on our land.

We discovered so much more - the winter woods are full of wonders.

Ground Ivy, free cough medicine.

A home ?

A mystery ?

I was told this creeping ground cover makes great wreaths and garlands.

We never noticed the size of this leaf when it was green.

Returning full circle up driveway - heading home for hot chocolate!

The Wheat Grass Experiment

2009-12-15T00:56:00.006-05:00

I tend to get immersed in my life lessons! I can't help making connections it's how I learn and how God teaches me. The garden has been a wonderful home school classroom and a life illustrator.

Remember everything that pertains to new life is in that seed. They are powerhouse foods anytime but in an emergency they can be your only source of green fresh food. So its good to store some beans, seeds, or grains for sprouting. Anyway, I tried my hand wheat grass to add some "green" to our juice and smoothies.

First, soak the wheat in water, until it begins to sprout.

Then add the sprouting wheat to moist soil and cover with plastic.

Keep moist.

In about a week you've got wheat grass.

I juiced it! I liked it! My family said it's too green!

They tolerate my "concoctions" as they call my teas, tinctures and broths.

But not this one - I should have mixed it with something sweet, and kept quiet.

If nothing else it's very pretty in the windowsill and compost it when it gets old.

NOTE: Most other sprouts can be sprouted in a mason jar with only water.

Sprouting

2009-12-09T23:07:00.005-05:00

What you sow is not made alive unless it dies. And what you sow, you do not sow the body that is going to be, but a bare grain (perhaps of wheat or of some of the rest). (1Co 15:36-37) . . . So also the resurrection of the dead. It is sown in corruption, it is raised in incorruption; it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power . . . (1Co 15:42-43)

. . . "wheat, or any other grain, is cast into the earth naked, beat out of the husk; and that selfsame grain rises up again, clothed with additional verdure, beauty, and fruitfulness; and so the body which comes out of its mother's womb naked, and returns naked again, [Job 1:21] to which the apostle seems to allude, will rise again the same body, though with additional glories and excellencies. . . " John Gill

"The process of germination [sprouting] not only produces vitamin C but also changes the composition of the grain and seed in numerous beneficial ways. Sprouting increases vitamin B content, especially B2, B5 and B6. Carotene increases dramatically- sometimes eightfold. Even more important, sprouting neutralizes enzyme inhibitors present in all seeds. These inhibitors can neutralize our own precious enzymes in the digestive tract. Complex sugars responsible for intestinal gas are broken down. . . and a portion of the starch in grain is transformed into sugar. . . Finally numerous enzymes that help digestion are produced during the germination process." Sally Fallon, Nourishing Traditions

Outside, I planted, weeded, picked pest, and watched thing grow this summer. Inside I fell to the ground, died, and sprouted. I can't get away from the theme. . . Oh how wonderful for God to till up the ground of our hearts, sow seeds of hope, and cultivate new life in us, though at the time I felt beat down and trodden. As my garden rest for the winter I give God praise for the lessons learned and the hope gained. Maybe every year I'll be pruned and tilled until that final day that I am raised incorruptible.

Behold, I speak a mystery to you; we shall not all fall asleep, but we shall all be changed; in a moment, in a glance of an eye, at the last trumpet. For a trumpet shall sound, and the dead shall be raised incorruptible, and we shall all be changed. . . But when this corruptible shall put on incorruption, and when this mortal shall put on immortality, then will take place the word that is written, "Death is swallowed up in victory. O death, where is your sting? O grave, where is your victory?" The sting of death is sin, and the strength of sin is the Law. But thanks be to God who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. So that, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not without fruit in the Lord. (1Co 15:51-58)

SEED OF LIFE

2009-12-05T22:01:00.006-05:00

Within the seed lies the potential for new life.

And the earth brought forth grass, and herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed was in itself, after his kind: and God saw that it was good. (Gen 1:12)

But if it doesn't fall down and die, it remains alone.

. . . Unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it abides alone;
but if it dies, it brings forth much fruit. John 12:24

We are His seed.

And if you are Christ's, then you are Abraham's seed and heirs according to the promise. Gal 3:29 . . . I will make thy seed to multiply as the stars of heaven . . . and in thy seed shall all the nations of the earth be blessed. Gen 26:4

We are seeds, sprouted into flesh. We fall to the ground corruptible and rise incorruptible.

. . . having been born again, not of corruptible seed, but of incorruptible, through the living Word of God, and abiding forever. 1Pe 1:23 For all flesh is as grass, and all the glory of men as the flower of the grass. The grass withers, and its flower falls out 1Pe 1:24

Did you know a seed can be stored indefinitely, as long as it remains whole and unbroken? But if it is ground into flour it immediately begins to degrade and has no more hope of sprouting. If it is planted, it dies but it will live again. It sprouts, laying down its life and all that is contained in it for the purpose of bringing forth new life.

It is a mystery, how a seed holds the potential for life, falls, dies and then produces more life.

All flesh is grass . . . we die daily.

We sprout, we wither, we die; but we will rise again. Incorruptible, never to die again. Jesus was the first. We will follow.

Are you dormant and unbroken, ground and sifted, dying, sprouting or producing fruit?

To Be Continued . . .

Thanksgiving Reflections

2009-12-02T15:17:00.010-05:00

O give thanks unto the Lord, for he is good, for his mercy endures forever. Psalm 107: 1

After a tumultuous year, I have a lot to be thankful for:

That our family gathered . . .

That we are still together . . .

That we have enough forgiveness to continue in God's Grace and each others favor . . .

That we had (always have) an abundance of food and people to share it with . . .

I have a lot to be thankful for but most of all I'm thankful for the HOPE that one day He will return and when he does He will . . . wipe away all tears from my eyes, and there will be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither will there be any more pain, for the former things are passed away. HE WILL MAKE ALL THINGS NEW!!!!! Rev. 21:4

Our simple tablescape: repurposed silk flowers and berries in thrift store urns, free pine cones, parchment card stock printed with things to be thankful for and verses of triumph, simple votives in wine glasses, ceramic pumpkins and gold painted dried pomegranates.

Thankful for HOPE!

2009-11-22T11:05:00.006-05:00

Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through Him we also have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice on the hope of the glory of God. And not only this, but we glory in afflictions also, knowing that afflictions work out patience, and patience works out experience, and experience works out hope. (Rom 5:1-4)

When we can't see how or when we will get the answers we seek we can always look up.

Being Prepared

2009-11-17T07:04:00.008-05:00

A prudent person foresees dangers and prepares. A virtuous wife is . . . "not afraid of snow for her household . . . Proverbs 31:21.

Our world could drastically change and our food supply could be interrupted without warning. Or we could be surprised by devastating weather. Althought most of the time we have ample warnings and up to minute information; it's always wise to be prepared.

When we moved to the country, we talked about the benefits of being able to live off of the land in the event of a global disaster. There is plenty of wildlife and space to grow food, but the skills and work - ugh! I have embraced gardening and herbal medicine, but not enough to feed us all year, and my husband says he'll hunt if he has but I need to learn how to "dress" wild game. (I shudder at the thought)

Anyway, I' have a stockpile of food and water just in case of a short term emergency. My goal is to build a long term storage of food and survival items. I use couponing freebies to build this collection of non-perishables.

This is whole wheat (red) and oats (white) in food grade buckets with gamma seal lids to protect it from pest and water.

It helps to learn how to cook from scratch so you can stockpile staples. Check out Food storage Made Easy for great tips on cooking from food storage.

At Safely Gathered In are some really good recipes as well as an ongoing project to build a 72 hour emergency kit item by item.

Pick up one or two extra items each time you shop. Let me know how you're doing.

Healthy Intentions

2009-11-11T07:11:00.011-05:00

Tending a garden is about so much more than growing food. It was God’s first assignment for man. “He gave us every green herb. . .” along roadsides and hedges in woods and fields . . . if you train your eye healing plants are everywhere. When you grow living foods in a garden or forage wild edibles you see the hand of God “giving every green herb” in a whole new light. How blind we have become by the packaged foods, pills, and supplements the worlds feeds us.

This summer I grew medicinal and culinary herbs, fruits and vegetables. I had my eyes opened to the wild foods and medicinals growing everywhere else. Just in my own yard God gave us hazelnut, ground ivy (for coughs and colds), black walnuts as a natural wormer, elderberry, chickweed, mullein, plantain, and so much more. No, I didn’t harvest all of these things but I identified them. Then chose a few to learn, harvest and store for the winter.

Elderberry bushes after clearing - can you see the fox?

While Swine Flu is on everyone’s mind, God gave us three mature elderberry bushes hiding in a brush pile. That’s a lot of flu medicine! Everything we can buy God can do it better! But not only does He give us the green herbs, He does something else while we are foraging and tending. He opens our eyes to behold the glory of His creation and He gives a clearer understanding of His provision.

Drying Elderberries

And still there is more. The very act of tending a garden - heals. the heart, mind, body and soul. Herbalist say that the intention of living off the land (I call it eating from the Hand of God) is healing because of the effort. The physical work, the sunshine, the fresh air, the peace of mind and tranquility are as beneficial as what we grow. I say eating from the Hand of God is like walking with Him daily. There is a peace in my yard and garden that I can’t find anywhere else. When I hear a cough or sniffle I just can’t explain the joy and thanksgiving to find what I need growing wild in my fields . . . straight from His Hand.

If you aren’t a green thumb gardener with acreage to farm, at least try a raised “square foot “or “lasagna garden” next spring. There are some great books on these easy low maintenance gardens. If not try a few potted herbs and veggies. I wish I could say we were 100% self reliant but that's a bit overambitious for these suburban transplants. Gardening is MY thing with help from my kids so we've found a way to make it simple and manageable. It's been great exercise and therapy.

One Year Later!

2009-11-07T20:24:00.004-05:00

After a whole year absence I'm back. Between my family, homeschooling and my garden I've been unable to devote any time to writing. I also gave up blogging because I was using dial-up and it was just too slow.

Thankfully my family life has lulled into a predictable peaceful rhythm. School - well - it's still school with all of its challenges. And aside from a few winter greens, my garden is laid to rest for the winter. And I finally have high broadband via satellite.

WHAT'S NEW?

Thanks to the fitness Fridays last November I started exercising and eating better to loose weight. I didn't renew my gym membership (I wasn't going anyway) so I put a mini "no excuse" gym downstairs. Its been a long slow process, but I've lost 35 lbs. None in the last few months, but I'm girding up for the holidays and working hard again.

I started coupon shopping again after putting it down for years. Couponing yields a lot of boxed and prepared foods so I'd given it up. My first choice is fresh and organic when we can afford it. But it has helped me save big on household products, batteries, personal hygiene items, paper, plastic, prepackaged snacks for field trips and outings, emergency food stockpiles, holiday baking and splurge items. During the spring and summer, deals were so hot I stockpiled the surplus. It is addictive and I've had to reign in the the thrill of the hunt for freebies and shop smart.

In the spring I started studying herbal medicine and gardening. I spent the summer growing herbs and vegetables and learning how to store and use the herbs medicinally. I am now even more convinced that God gave us every green herb and seed to meet our nutritional and medicinal needs. This summer I learned of and started making a fermented tea called Kombucha that is full of probiotics and b vitamins. It has too many benefits to name now, but my favorite is - sustained energy. No more sleepy sluggish afternoons!

I had one daughter start community college. My second is a serious artist is keeping me busy with art and writing classes. She is planning to attend a university to study art so that requires quite a bit more preparation. Right now this seems like a monumental task - but I'm taking it one step at a time - while still schooling the boys.

My immediate and extended family has seen its share of "drama" this year - more deaths than births, heartaches and losses but where there has been valleys there has also been mountain tops. God is always faithful and turns our mourning into joy. I could write volumes on this year. But for now I'll look ahead. . .

Peace

Fitness Friday - Excuses Excuses

2008-11-21T14:47:00.003-05:00

A few years ago I learned in a "cold hard truth" in a First Place Bible study: An excuse is a lie dressed up as a reason. OH THAT HURTS!

But I've been pretty good at dressing them up so that they true. After years of practice I can always win the arguments my subconscious presents.

This one morsel won't add any weight.

Tomorrow!

It's the weekend!

Deprivation leads to binges, so we should enjoy what we want in moderation.

It's the holiday!

Too many bugs to walk

It's a party

Too many stray dogs to walk

It's a movie!

Gym's cost too much.

It's that time of the month!

What the heck!

I'll start on Monday (so this week is already a lost cause)

I'll start on the 1st of next month (its the 2nd)

I'll start after the holidays (but they keep coming)

It's like I've been at the bottom of the escalator waiting to step on the next step. . .no the next one . . . OK, here I go. . . never mind. . . oh yeah the next one. . . definitely the next one. . . . but they keep rolling by . . . finally I just picked one and stepped on. Then it stopped and made me climb. - an uphill climb.

Thankfully I'm taking it one day, no, one moment at a time. No more tomorrows, or next weeks, or next months. Every time I fall, I get up that moment and go up one step at a time. It's not easy but it feels so much better being on the steps going up than to still be standing at the bottom waiting.

No more excuses for me. I am worth the money it takes to get the support I need. My friend, cousin-in-law and sister in Christ told me (paraphrased) "Everyone needs something different to loose weight. When someone says 'all you need to do is. . . ' just remember that what works for them may not work for you." Go on and get the support you need." I'll let you know what that is in a future post. Stay tuned. . .

Looking Ahead

2008-11-18T18:54:00.005-05:00

Commit thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts shall be established. Proverbs 16:3

It's been weeks or has it been a month or more since my last post? I have been away doing what seems to be second nature lately - growing! Once again soul searching, and growing out of my comfort skin and into something new.

More than ever before, my future is calling me. I'm looking out there into it to see what it holds then looking back where I am to see what I can do to get there. I'm in my early 40's - perhaps this is a midlife crisis? No! I like to think of it as a midlife attitude adjustment. For years I've been crippled by what seemed like impossibility. I have to care for kids and quite a few years left to homeschool, student loans still looming, weight to loose that yo-yo's up and down but never away, books to read and not enough time to read them, books in my head to write and no focus to pen them, endless housework, chores and projects started that never get finished . . . you get the idea. I could go on and on listing things I need and want to do but can't seem to accomplish because of time or because of fear, and doubt.

My latest endeavor is erase the fear and doubt, establish goals and follow through with the necessary steps to get them done with the 24 hours I have been blessed with just like everyone else. My future is bright, and I will no longer be crippled by what seems impossible but I will trust the Lord enough to make the plans, and then to position myself on the path to fulfilling the plans with His help and direction.

For a while I've had some things on my heart to do in my life to change its course. My mom, is the prudent one, able to make plans, and see them through thoroughly to completion. With her encouragement, I have taken what was once an obstacle and turned it into a goal, and now I am one step toward fulfilling that goal and therefore it no longer stands in my way. I can clearly see the path to the end, because its planned out and plain before me. Why didn't I do that before? Since early October, God has gradually been bringing people and information to me to teach me this principle. Today in my reading of Proverbs 16, I stumbled on the two verses in this post. Confirmation that it is up to me to plan in my heart, and trust Him to order the steps.

A man's heart deviseth his way: but the LORD directeth his steps.
Proverbs 16:9

A Definition of a Real Hero

2008-11-02T11:53:00.005-05:00

As we prepare to vote to put a new president in office, I was reflecting on all that’s been said of each candidate. I have my own ideas about who could best lead us but I won’t express those here. My husband told me once: “Look at what I do and not so much to what I say.” As person who loves words, remembers them and hangs on them, I’m not quick to ignore words but in all of my years of marriage, I admit - he’s right! Sure, some words should be forgotten and forgiven, but his track record of faithful service and devotion stands.

In the multitude of words and rhetoric, I am reminded of the character of the men I love and trust. The world has its definition of a hero, or a leader - one who has seen military action, served their country, laid down their life for their fellow man and or their country etc. . . But “the husband of one wife” is worthy of commendation. Ask anyone willing to be honest how much grit and determination that requires. In the trenches of marriage beyond the honeymoon when kids, bills, weight gain, hair loss, sickness, media sabotage, and the daily grind is tearing away at your resolve – that’s when a man or woman is tested and their true nature is revealed.

I personally know that a hero is more than a person who returns from war. My husband did that already, and yes, I’m proud of his sacrifice and service. But I’m more proud and awed by his service at home. From one battlefield to a different one; the years that followed the gulf war we were on a battlefield of our own. But he did not break!!! We are still here and that is something to be commended.

No one ever called my dad or granddaddy heroes. No one really commends extraordinary men who stay and provide for their families when leaving would be so much easier. While women in the media and workplace are torturing them with a continual onslaught of images and propositions that make it almost impossible to do what’s right. There is a time in a marriage when love is NOT enough. There is a time when character and commitment outshines the warm fuzzies of love and that’s when a man is tested. My husband, father and grandfather are my true Heroes.

Smile, it Could be Habit Forming. . .

2008-10-21T19:37:00.006-04:00

A habit is an unconscious inclination to perform an act, acquired through frequent repetition. In other words, a habit is anything we do continuously or permanently because we have practice doing frequently. Oh, this hurts!

A discontented grouchy grimace, if rehearsed and fueled can become a habit. Joy and its accompanying smile, if rehearsed and fueled can also become a habit. It is a choice and sometimes I find I’m just in a rut making the wrong choice.

In a previous post, I mentioned how women have the awesome power and responsibility to establish the climate of their home by their conversation and disposition.

I’ve been challenged this week to smile, and make my husband smile. What amazing timing these things have for finding their way to my reading, when I’m the farthest from them. It goes on to say that when we dated our husbands we smiled and we made them smile. In their eyes we were such pretty young things and they are falling all over their own feet to make us happy. Sadly, the years roll by and we (maybe I should speak for myself and say I) began to take each other for granted. I wonder how often I smile at my husband?

My father used to tease my mom about a scowl she would wear when she was thinking or concentrating. It was a light teasing just something to make us laugh. But, I’ve noticed that I do the same thing when I’m reading, thinking or concentrating. I’ve pulled the visor down in the car and noticed it when I’m driving – it’s a squint/frown. YUK! I hope I don’t do that too often. Maybe a need a brow lift!!!! Or I should practice wearing a brighter expression.

Anyway, the challenge is not only to smile, which changes how you look on the outside, but also to make a plan to practice joy every day and watch the people around you respond, especially your husband.

A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance: but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken. Proverbs 15:13

Fitness Friday already?

2008-10-17T20:11:00.004-04:00

Didn't get to post anything this week, where has the time gone?
This week has been, OK. I did lighten up a bit! But I didn't exercise. Shame on me!

I didn't fry anything. I was tempted, but I oven fried our fish instead and it was a nice alternative to frying.

Still cutting back on cheese - This week I didn't buy any cheddar, or mozzarella. While it is a good source of protein, its a hidden source of a lot of fat, and if I'm not careful it sneaks its way into meals and snacks too often.

I'm looking forward to continuing next week lighter than this week. Taking small steps to improve our family eating, but mostly to cut back on my own portion sizes and in between meal snacks.

Speaking of snacks: With children its hard not to snack. As a rule we don't buy packaged snacks unless we have company. I bought some chips a few weeks ago because they were buy one get one free. I shouldn't have! My family likes ice cream, and my middle daughter aka "Muffin" often makes deserts, from scratch, to go with it, so saying no is hard. She makes a mean carrot cake!!! I've asked her to refrain for my sake. My oldest daughter aka "Cupcake" loves sweets too, and since she works she often brings home snacks and candy. I'm asking her to stop too!

So what will we snack on?
Trail mix
Popcorn
Nuts
Fruit
Smoothies/sorbet
cream cheese/crackers
peanut butter/ apples

When we do need a chocolate or ice cream fix, I'll have to purchase single servings boxed ice cream bars. Slim fast makes a good chocolate bar, and there are some good low cal ice cream bars by Blue Bunny, and Weight Watchers. This way there can be portion control and none to spare.

Any other snack suggestions are welcomed!

This week I know I need to add some exercise. I'd much rather read a good book but there's no way to get around it!

Gulp . . . Fitness Friday . . . ouch!

2008-10-12T13:26:00.004-04:00

I'm already two days behind, but I'll give it a go.

Our family eats good quality food, but I eat too much of it. My husband has been vegetarian for several months. (self control isn't a problem for his iron will) He says he feels better lightening up his diet and giving his body a break from digesting meat. I . . . well. . . I like meat, no pork or beef, only chicken and fish but I like it. So I've cut back.

He said he felt better but hadn't lost weight. I say its because we cut out meat or in my case cut back but we substitute with more carbs, eggs and cheese to fill up. I really need to watch the carbs. Of course we try to eat only whole wheat and brown rice but they are still carbs and oh. . . potatoes. . . mmm.

So its time to prepare my menu for next week. I'm going to lighten up our meals by:

Oven frying and baking without the skin

Cutting back on carbs - only the essential high fiber cereal for me!

Serving more fresh and raw fruits and veggies

No crunchy munchy salty bagged snacks - just the usual nuts, seeds and dry fruit - we eat homemade popcorn with movies!

Less cheese - ouch!

This has been a struggle for me most of my adult life especially after children. I know it can be done one baby step at a time. . . I'll let you know how it goes next Friday.

Fitness Friday is the brainchild of Brenda at The Family Revised. Pop over and check her out and link your Fitness Friday post, she's controlling portions using a smaller plate. I think I'll try that too. . .

Are These Thy Brethren, Lord?

2008-10-11T00:15:00.006-04:00

This post has nothing to do with inward peace or a happy home, its a vent. We can do that at least once a month can't we? Well, I consider myself a nature lover. I enjoy watching the wildlife that frequents our woods. I've taught my children to appreciate their contribution to the environment, and we marvel at how wondrously they are created to survive. I believe they are God's creation and deserve to be respected and treated fairly. BUT. . . How much is enough?

A couple of months ago, a representative from a wildlife rescue came to the library and spoke about nocturnal animals. She brought live rehabilitated animals who are now "ambassadors" traveling and educating children. I was glad my boys were able to see the animals up close. BUT. . . I couldn't help but think about the money and resources that it takes to provide this kind of "care."

The animals are brought by well meaning citizens from the side of the road, when they've fallen from their tree, or been dragged home by dogs; but they are all given medical treatment, and released or kept if they are unable to care for themselves as a result of their injuries.

Meanwhile, a uninsured member of my family is diagnosed with Colon Cancer after postponing her much needed colonoscopy until she could come up with about $800 cash to pay for the procedure.

Later, I took my son to the emergency because he was complaining of abdominal pain. While I stood by his bed comforting him, a girl rolled in a computer and started asking questions about payment. She was tactful, but persistent. My other children had my purse in the lobby, I didn't have any means of providing her with payment information and I wasn't leaving that bedside. I was angry because I felt it was an inappropriate time and place for pressure to pay. Wasn't his care more important than money - at that time. It was to me!

I couldn't help but think: If he was a squirrel that had been hit by a car, he would have been given care - no questions asked. If he was an owl found laying on the railroad tracks he would have been given care - no questions asked. If he was possum that a dog had dragged home -he would have been given care, no questions asked.

Today I got an email about a cute little baby deer they've named Rupert. Oh yes, he is adorable and as I prefaced this post, I enjoy and respect animals as God's creation. But am I the only one that sees how much money and and resources is spent on wild animals? I'm not talking about health care for working animals, farm animals, or family pets. I'm talking about the blank check spending for any and every wild thing that finds itself injured or endangered.

Should an animal be given unlimited access to food and care and a home when every human isn't able to afford that? Should a country as in debt as we are continue this kind of spending? I'm wondering if there will be a reward for the benevolence shown to animals while people continue to go without.

Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me. . . Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when . . . And the King shall answer and say unto them . . . Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me. Matthew 25:34-40

Keeping Home

2008-10-08T21:14:00.006-04:00

That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Titus 2:4-5

STRONGS: From G3624 (a guard; be "ware"); a stayer at home, that is, domestically inclined (a "good housekeeper"): - keeper at home.
WEBSTER: KEE'PER, n. One who keeps; one that holds or has possession of any thing. One who has the care, custody or superintendence of any thing. To regard; to attend to. To hold in one's own bosom; to confine to one's own knowledge; not to disclose or communicate to others; not to betray; as, to keep a secret; to keep one's own counsel.
With this enormous responsibility comes power . We are not called to any task we are not equipped to perform. As keepers we are entrusted with the daily care and supervision of a home and the people in it. But there's more! It is as though we are the mood and melody and the very essence of our home. As we go, so the whole house goes. We, wives, mothers and keepers wield a lot of power. "If momma ain't happy nobody is happy."
We are supposed to set a mood in our homes that is happy and peaceful and a refuge from the world. There is a "world" out there that we ought to be blocking out of our homes. Within our walls there ought to be harmony and rest. That's why it should be clean, organized, comfortably furnished, warm, inviting, stocked and given to hospitality. I'd like to get rid of the TV, it's a window to that wicked world and we invite it in. So we limit it.
Then there is internal conflict to keep at peace. I have to wrestle with my emotions, and mood swings more than anyone in this house. When I'm out of sync and grouchy the whole house gets grouchy, when someone else is grouchy I have to restore peace and rebuke discord. It seems to me that I'm suppose to model good behavior, and nothing is worse when I see someone acting like me. Well, yeah something is worse: when your kids get old enough to see through your hypocrisy and see that you don't walk your talk. OUCH!
We also watch, being vigilant and diligent in our watching always on guard for any enemy slipping in to kill steal and destroy. I know that's hubby's job, he's the strong man, no one or thing comes in here without going through him. But there's a spiritual watching, a discerning with a spiritual radar that we keepers monitor quietly behind the scenes (watching and seeing things husbands can't see): watching moods, attitudes, discerning needs, looking almost into what is hidden in the hearts and minds of our family and knowing what to pray and when to pray, knowing what to say and when to say it.
Finally, as I reflect on this role as a keeper, I pray that God will help me do all of this with grace, and the inward adorning of a meek and quiet spirit.

IT'S TIME TO WORK!

2008-10-04T13:46:00.007-04:00

Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus. Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:12-14

I've done some re-evaluating lately. You know when you look at what you are doing and say, "Can this be improved?" It's something I do often, sometimes the results are improvement sometimes more frustration but always more work.

I don’t think perfection is too lofty of a goal for a wife and mother, but I'm NOT a perfectionist. I am NOT there but I can't reach for anything less, otherwise I default to complacency, then I find myself frustrated at the mess, clutter, neglect and disorder.

Have you ever been annoyed when someone says "I'm hungry, Ma." I have, and it,s not because we don't have food, it's because I have failed to prepare it on time, or failed to consider the "real" needs of boys with high metabolism, or that I've got something on my mind I'd rather be doing besides serving . . . again.

In school we are working to improve poor study habits, irresponsibility, and distractions. So, I've adopted a new standard that is raising the bar for all my children and it begins with good organization, good notetaking, reading directions, good posture and neat writing, having a clean work area, confiscating toys and games that pop up during school and accepting nothing less than excellence.

I used to accept 80% as passing. In retrospect that's still a lot wrong, so I've raised the bar to 90%. If they master, we go forward, and skip drills if they don't they practice practice practice. So every day the question is "will they go forward or will they go back?" The answer is up to them and how well they proofread and pay attention to details.

Around the house instead of being the chore police, standing somewhere scanning the intersection calling out orders. "Come get your. . . hey, pick up that. . . your chores aren't done. . . is your bathroom clean? . . I've had to raise the bar there too. I'd hoped by now this would automatic. Sometimes I wait and see if they'll remember sometimes I have to intervene. When the TV clicks off, or their breakfast is postponed they get it.

But first, I have to get up to do do the unpopular, the unthinkable and interfere in their free time and demand work before play. Sometimes re-instructing them in how to do a thorough cleaning job, helping them learn to manage their time so they can fit in their chores; whatever it takes I've got to teach it.

A good friend told me once that when she sees neglect, irresponsibility or slothfulness in her kids and their chores, its because she has failed to do her job. OUCH! One day instead of being frustrated the Lord whispered to her "TODAY, YOU HAVE TO WORK" and work she did. When she shared this with me it was a painful cold hard truth, that I too had to deal with. So if I'm re-evaluating their progress it's time for me to WORK harder.

Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect. Matthew 5:48

WHO SAY’S HOMESCHOOLERS DON’T SOCIALIZE?

2008-09-29T16:44:00.003-04:00

Socialization is the big 4-letter word for critics of homeschooling because it’s the one card they play to silence us and make their case for public school. My children are all home schooled. My teens are (19, 15, and 14).

In order keep our kids safe, alive, and pure; we have drawn some clear hard lines in the sand. NO DATING, NO SLEEPOVERS, NO CHILD OF OURS IS EVER ALONE WITH AN ADULT/NON–IMMEDIATE FAMILY MEMBER – (as a personal unspoken rule, I don’t give my children a chance to be in the presence of any adult alone for any reason) We don’t assume everyone is a predator, we just make the rule and keep it across the board so we don’t have to discern who is and who isn’t. Call us crazy or extreme but they are all alive and untouched!!!! Anyway, to my surprise and theirs; there are still a world of things to do and people to do them with.

When my older kids were preteens they did get lonely at home: we prayed – “God there is a void, please fill it with what and who we need.” Along came a home school family into our life with matching values and compatible ages. Then another and then another. Just a few that’s all we needed.

Lesson #1 - about real life socialization, It doesn’t take 30 same age people in a room together to have a lot fun.

Lesson #2 - in the real world we are blessed to have a handful of faithful good friends that we can share our life with.

Lesson #3 - There is a difference between friends and acquaintances. Friends we keep and cherish the others are just people we know. I think most teens need to KNOW a lot of people, however homeschoolers learn to treasure a few good friends.

With that said, the rest is up to us. After we met a few good home school friends we then had to cultivate those relationships to give our kids the rich experiences kids crave. That takes some work: taking them places, picking them up, chaperoning but slowly over the years we have been able to release the reigns and give them more and more freedom within safe boundaries.

As our preteens became teens, we found a few other families with teens and like values and unofficially a little safe network of teens formed. We are all a part of a very large home school network here, but this group of teens met and formed their own private clique on the fringes of that group. What resulted was PARTIES!!!!!! We parents take turns hosting. They are simple but safe. Only invited kids so that each family must know the kids that come their house. We set out some teen friendly party food, like pizza, chips and junk and they hang out playing video games, listening to music, (yes, music) eating junk food and having a blast well into the night. Because we live far out in the country I set my ending time at 11:30 because I wanted the kids that were driving to get on the road home before midnight, other parents set the time “until.” But I’ve never heard this being abused.

I remember when the kids were content with video games, movies and at our house campfires and hiking, as they grew older, someone would bring CD’s then we had to say this music is OK, and this is NOT. They were fine with the music boundaries, I had to bend a little and allow some popular music I wouldn’t otherwise have wanted but there were boundaries. I had to put up with a lot of noise in my house on those nights uproarious laughter and loud music. I had to keep my little boys occupied watching movies with me in my room so the teens could have the family room. There was also the expense of the food, and the mess of dishes to clean up but nothing was due to abuse or neglect. They are a respectful and thoughtful group and they treated our home with respect.

Some of the original group has gone off to college but they get together when they are home visiting. I am thankful they’ve had the opportunity to be normal and have this kind of fun under the careful supervision and control.

My little boys are 8 and they even crave “hanging out” with their friends. Do they have 20 – 30 of them? No, but the ones they do have are what I like to call “real keepers” so we make an effort to see them as often as possible. Many of my boys friends are the younger siblings of my teen’s friends. They have birthday parties, of course, and we meet at the park or library or take field trips together. They also like bowling and skating. We have other nameless days and occasions to just get together and let them play or watch movies. The point is that we have to give the opportunities and still maintain control of it. Control is not a nasty word, neither is shelter!

Yes, socialization is an issue with homeschooling. We have to make it happened but we get to control it. They are not sheltered, but we are selective. We choose who, and where. Is that so bad?